Seeing Ghosts
by Ratkinzluver33
Summary: He was right, of course. Kylo could no longer trust his own senses, when flickers of light hovered at the edge of his vision, and faint laughter trailed down the hallways of the Finalizer's emptiest wings. He could taste earth on his tongue, and there was this smell, of smoke and metal. - (OR, Kylo Ren gets haunted by Anakin Skywalker, and it goes as well as can be expected.) - M/M
1. Unwanted Guest

**General Author's Note:** WHO CARES IF I'M WORKING ON, LIKE, TEN OTHER FICS? WHAT'S ANOTHER ONE?

Behold, something I can't regret. I had to write it, because a) the plotbunny wouldn't leave me, b) the plotbunny wouldn't leave me, and c) the plotbunny wouldn't leave me. Tbh, I didn't really try all that hard to get rid of it.

Dedicated to my dear Shaky, for putting up with my writing crises, and for being a fantastic friend and Beta and frequent co-author and so much more! Love you, darling, hope you enjoy. C:

 **Pairings (currently):** Kylux, Obikin, Skysolo

* * *

Hux was right about him. He was going insane, slowly, steadily, and surely.

To Kylo, the Force was a guiding hand. It never lied, it never misled him. It stood firm where nothing else ever could. And yet, now, it was falling, and Kylo realised there was no debris to hang onto in this shipwreck.

He was seeing things. Things that shouldn't, by any means, have any place on _Starkiller_ base. Hearing things, _feeling_ things. As if a consistent presence trailed him like a lost puppy, and insisted on dumping its problems onto his own shoulders.

Snoke had told him much of the Force, had talked reverently about joining it as one, upon an honourable death. In his subtle way, he'd hinted that the Force's dead weren't as inanimated and cold as the corpses he'd climbed like ladders to achieve his rank.

But the Ghosts of the Living Force were supposed to offer coherency. They weren't elusive. But this one was, hiding in shadows, eyes searing him like brands, knowing his every hope, his every failure and success. It unsettled him.

Considerably.

* * *

Perhaps the only person who remained in their right mind was General Hux himself. The bridge was empty. Kylo was there for research, oversight. Hux was there for... pride? Pleasure in sailing through the stars on his great many living weapons, surveying the galaxy and choosing where to stick the pins on the map.

Hux was refreshingly impolite. His orders were perhaps the only thing on the ship that kept them all from killing themselves in awful accidents. Kylo was not so unaware of himself as to think he was not half-responsible for most of the _Finalizer's_ equipment destruction. Of course, to Hux, Kylo was an annoyance. An acute annoyance, a sharp piercing headache, a rock thrown into a stream's smooth flow.

"You look ill," Hux said, casually.

"I'm fine."

"You know the Supreme Leader doesn't take well to-"

"I _said_ I am fine."

Hux didn't believe this. It was clear in his eyes, sharp and judging and digging into his skin like knives.

He was right, of course. Kylo could no longer trust his own senses, when flickers of light hovered at the edge of his vision, and faint laughter trailed down the hallways of the _Finalizer's_ emptiest wings. He could taste earth on his tongue, and there was this smell, of smoke and metal.

He hadn't told Snoke. He _couldn't_ tell Snoke, unless he wished to see his neck snapped swiftly and his body paraded around like a trophy. Failure wasn't tolerated, and this was undoubtedly failure. To keep his sanity, to remain calm, to work in spite of his rapidly deteriorating mind.

"Cease that," Hux snapped, and Kylo tilted his head, bird-like.

"Cease what, General Hux?"

"That awful, self-pity wallowing, Ren. You're affecting the ship. Or have you not noticed the recent failures in the _Finalizer's_ lighting?"

"So you've noticed it as well?"

"Of course I've noticed it. It's my job to keep this ship in working order, and _you_ are interfering."

"I'm only curious." Kylo hummed. "I'm not the one causing this, General, and I've been spending quite some time trying to figure out who _is._ "

"You thought you'd gone mad," Hux said.

"I would never doubt the messages the Force chooses to send me-"

"You were sure you were imagining it. Well, Ren, I can assure you, you most certainly are _not_ sane, but you're not hallucinating, either. Whatever, or whomever, is toying with the ship is very much real."

"And you're not concerned?"

"Oh, I'm concerned, but up until just a few minutes ago, I was convinced _you_ were the one behind all this, Ren. I hadn't thought to attribute it to anyone else, you see, considering you're the reason for over half the damage on this ship."

"I'm going to find out who's doing this," Kylo said, suddenly. "It's... bothering me. And interrupting my work."

"Excuse me, did you just say you have _work_ to do here? Consider me shocked." Hux huffed. "I'll accompany you. I intend to throw whomever's behind this in the medbay where they belong."

"Fine," Kylo said. "Don't get in my way."

" _Your_ way? Whose ship is this exactly?"

* * *

It wasn't his ship. That much the Ghost made very clear. Nothing about this was his ship, from the way the Ghost slithered through its every hallway and led them in circles they didn't realise were circles until it was too late.

"I get the impression we're following something," Hux said.

"You're getting the correct impression. There's somebody here."

"That would take an immense amount of luck, dedication, and sheer effort. I hold this ship's security to prison standards."

"I recognise that. No, it's not an intruder." Kylo hummed. "No, something different. The Force."

"The Force is leading us on a wild goose chase? For what purpose?"

"That's what I'm trying to find out, General."

"Oh, by all means, then, endlessly trail after it like a lost child. Or you can help me track it on our scanners, and save us from making complete fools of ourselves."

"And you believe this is a better option than 'endlessly trailing it like a lost child'?" Kylo tilted his head, in genuine curiosity. Hux fascinated him. What Hux did forwards, Kylo did backwards. But where Kylo went right, so did Hux. And up, and down. Different approaches to the same goal.

"Can you see the Force?"

"Let's find out," said Kylo, and strode forward. "This will get us nowhere."

"I have, in fact, brought this topic up before."

* * *

The scanners showed something, but not anything Kylo could truly make out. A flash of blue, here and there, outlined by thick, hooded robes. A Force Ghost, he had declared, and Hux had accepted it because _Kylo_ was here, and what other terrible things could Kylo bring on board at this point? What more could catch him off guard?

"Force Ghosts it is," Hux said, sounding as if the words were sharp glass, cutting his lips on every uttered syllable.

"I promise you I am correct, General."

Hux was silent. He ran a hand over his cap, then across the buttons of his greatcoat. It looked somehow warmer than Kylo's own garments. "Whose ghost?" he asked, eventually, slipping cold hands into warm pockets.

"I'm attempting to piece that together now."

"You don't know."

"Why should I? Snoke is my relay. My messengers do not come directly, General. At least, not until now."

"And this concerns you?"

"We may have an unwanted guest."

"I see."

Hux paced the control room, hands tied in knots against his back. "We'll have to find them, and soon, unless you want the Supreme Leader finding out about our little problem?"

"He musn't."

"Then work with me." Hux flicked a dismissive hand. "We will find this 'ghost.' They cannot run forever."

They could not. Kylo was more worried about what they'd do when Hux and he found them.

* * *

 **Author's Note For Chap 1:** Hi. You may know me as that one chick who has no idea what the fuck she's doing, ever. I'm working on this fic even though I shouldn't be. I'll try my absolute damndest to update (I do actually enjoy following through and not abandoning things, I swear), but if I don't, uh. Uhm. I'm trying, I promise.

I usually write crack. Well, okay, crack treated oddly seriously. Please tell me if I accidentally forget what serious means. Or if I fuck up characterisation, or if there are plotholes, or if something is dumb as fuck, or, y'know. Like, if anything.

Sorry for the shortness! It's just a quick push-start to get this raft down the river of hell that is writing for your OTP. I'm not the only one who feels this, right? I'll try to lengthen them up, cross my heart. Though I really do hope not to die. I have a life of trash to fulfill D:!

Enjoy :)!


	2. Chase

Kylo had grown tired of searching through endless holofeed, finding nothing but lazy 'Troopers, or off-duty officers following their mundane schedules, drinking their bland caf, listening blindly to orders like the mindless little things they were.

A hand reached for the hilt of his 'saber, which Hux caught swiftly. "A blaster bolt would be much more efficient, if you insist on ruining my equipment."

"I am growing tired of fruitless searching."

"Half the problems you have in this life could be solved by extending your patience a little further, Ren. Now, be quiet while I look. There seems to be a pattern."

"Of the Ghost leading us to dead end after dead end, General. They are toying with us."

"Nobody can be perfect," Hux said, twirling Kylo's lightsaber idly in his fingers. "They'll slip up eventually, and I'll be there to find them when they do."

Kylo twitched. Action, they needed action. He needed to leave the confines of the comm centre and scour the ship properly. "Did your parents never teach you not to take what isn't yours?"

"Oh, no." And Hux smiled a very pleasant smile that unsettled Kylo in its believability. "They taught me that everything was mine already." But Hux dropped the hilt into Kylo's open hand, and went back to searching, eyes narrowed in on the flickering lights like breadcrumbs that had led them only hours before to the emptiest, most useless places on the ship.

"Do you plan to find any meaning in that?"

"If you'd allow me to focus, yes."

Kylo was impatient. And Hux wasn't listening to him. But, _different approaches, same goals,_ he thought, and tried with all his might not to slash the nearest console. "Tell me when you are ready to be productive," Kylo said, and Hux snorted.

"I'm the only one in this room who's doing anything productive at this moment, Ren." A sigh. "Yes, I will tell you. Go, do whatever it is you do."

"No, I think I'd rather stay." _You're more interesting than the rest of this ship,_ he didn't say. Hux surely couldn't hear him, but part of Kylo wished he could. If only that Hux would preen at the thought and attempt to do something more impressive than shuffle through holos.

"I'm not here to entertain you, Ren," Hux replied, shortly, and Kylo blinked. Had he heard? No, of course he hadn't. The General had the strange ability to read people without their knowing, only by looking them over with his usual disdain, and he was using it now.

"They aren't, either." He dragged a gloved finger over the face of an officer on his lunchbreak.

"Don't-" Hux sneered. "How like you, to expect everyone bend to your will. Do something useful and help me search, if you want something to occupy your mind."

"They bend to my will because I deserve no less, and because I am right."

"Are you right about the location of this Ghost, I wonder?" But Hux's eyes were still on the feed.

They would see.

* * *

"There," Hux said, mouth curved up in a victorious grin. "There, see, I found it, as I knew-"

Kylo blinked his eyes open from beneath the mask. "Yes?"

"Why are you sleeping on the job, Ren?" Hux stared with something other than hatred, and more like utter shock. "I asked you to help!"

"I was meditating."

"While we work," Hux continued, and instead of anger, his face flushed bright with laughter. "Hells, Ren, the _nerve_ of you is unbelievable, I can't even comprehend the level of disregard you must have for this ship's natural hierarchy, if you would meditate while we attempt to weasel out a possible intruder."

"Definite. Definite intruder," Kylo corrected.

"Oh, even better!" Hux threw up his hands, greatcoat flaring out behind him. "Well, lucky for you, I seem to have found something."

"What?"

"Shadows."

Kylo stared, though Hux couldn't clearly see it. "What about them, General?"

"The Ghost can't hide their shadow, it's quite entertaining, really. You can see, here," at this, he swept a hand over the image of the leftmost corridor wall, "that they actually stand and wait for us to reach the passageway end before moving forward. You were right to say they were toying with us."

"They still are. Leading us like dogs," Kylo began, spitting.

"Oh, have patience, my friend, playing along might get us more information. Useful information."

Since when were they friends? But Kylo let go of that thought, and moved swiftly onto the next. "You want to allow the Ghost to bait us?"

"And, at the same time, we bait them." Hux smiled. "Turnabout's fair play, don't you think?"

Reluctantly, he did. "We follow the shadow, then, correct?"

"Or shadows. They may have backup, if they have any sense at all."

"Which they don't," Kylo snapped. "Coming here."

"You'll be surprised at how much feigned strength a group can offer. Though, working alone, maybe you'll never have the displeasure."

"I'm not working alone now," Kylo said, stupidly. But Hux was wrong, and strength _was_ in numbers, provided they were the right ones. He would not share breath with incompetent children. Hux, for all his grating superiority, was still deserving of his rank. Others did not share such a distinction.

"No, I suppose you aren't. The Supreme Leader will be pleased to see you stretching such unused muscles, hmm? Teamwork, Lord Ren? What next?"

"The Ghost's neck in my hands."

"You do get to the point, don't you?"

* * *

The hallway was cold, that was the first thing to come to his attention. The _Finalizer_ was always cold, but never below viable temperatures. This felt as if it were chewing away at his skin. Hux sniffed.

"We're on the right path, it seems. At the very least, we have that."

"This isn't much, General."

Hux huffed, looking, despite their size, somehow down at him with distaste. "Better than we were a few hours ago."

"You don't approve of my attitude?" Kylo asked, absentmindedly. His attention was on the shadow, flitting about, eagerly pacing at the end of the corridor. "I'm only being realistic, you understand." And it was realism. Following a playful abscence of light around the ship like younglings was no more fit for people of their calibre than a spot begging on the streets of some Outer Rim hovel.

"While I approve of your will to be productive, for once, I think you'll find this far more beneficial than you believe."

"Chasing shadows?"

"Tracking shadows," Hux corrected, and walked on.

The Ghost had long since moved to the next corridor, but Hux and he already knew their movements. Erratic, yes, but there were only so many dead ends on the ship. For the first time, Kylo considered if this could possibly be worth all the effort.

"Don't give up so quickly." Hux had stopped, now, looking left and right between the intersection they'd been led to. He slipped a glove off one hand, and held it out to test the air. "Colder on the right. Deeper into the heart of the ship? Honestly, they could try a little harder to mask their presence, don't you think? You would know about these things, wouldn't you, Lord Ren?"

"It may not be their intention to hide themselves from us," Kylo offered, feeling absurdly obligated to offer some useful advice in the face of Hux's taunts. He had no need to prove himself. And yet Hux made him want to.

"That's looking more and more like the case," Hux said, and rubbed a hand over his forehead, fingers trailing down to pinch the bridge of his nose. Kylo could sense a headache developing. The cold air, perhaps. Or the sheer monotony. "Why on my ship of all karking places?" He said it to himself, barely a whisper, but Kylo caught it regardless. He gave a soft frown.

"If it's any consolation, General, I'm beginning to suspect the Ghost is here for me and me alone."

"Trust that you would hear that. Have you considered that might be a little self-centred? You're not the only important individual on this ship, Ren."

"No," Kylo replied, and peered down the intersection they'd been led to. "But I am the only one who has any talent in the Force."

Hux twitched. "Very well. We'll have to see when we get there. But don't expect it to feed your ego, Lord Ren, I think you'll find yourself sorely disappointed."

* * *

For all Kylo talked, a sense of great, rising dread washed over him the farther and farther he strayed away from his quarters. Every step into the ship's heart made him feel as if he were walking into a trap that would cripple him forever.

Of course, that wasn't the case. That would never be the case. A mere Force Ghost couldn't pose a threat to someone with his training, but that they could, even at a subconscious level, suggest he should believe this... Kylo was not sure they were dealing with a simple haunting any longer.

Hux kept flashing him concerned looks, until finally, he stopped in a corridor and threw up his hands. "This would go a lot faster if you stopped cowering away, ceased your ridiculous trembling, and realised that a Ghost could never hurt you. For all in the nine karking hells, I can't figure out why you would even begin to believe that in the first place, but here we are."

"I am not _trembling,_ " Kylo spat. "I am - rightfully - wary. This creature has power."

"It's dead."

Kylo tilted his head, and fell back, into a sort of mocking that came naturally. "Surely you've come to think outside that sorrowfully narrow box they instilled within you during training, General Hux?"

"Oh, yes, very good impression." Hux sighed. "If only you would focus your efforts into something productive, instead of..." When he didn't finish, Kylo motioned for him to continue. "You want me to follow this line of thought, Ren, really?"

"The silence is... unsettling."

"And the sound of my voice is less so?"

"Compared to the threat we are facing; yes."

"You think this is truly serious," Hux said. It wasn't a question any longer.

"There is something _wrong_ with it. I feel as if it knows me."

"And you're sure that's not your martyr complex, that it's not a way for you to project your myriad of other issues onto others? It's presumptuous to assume-"

"Not just me. The ship. Our ways. It knows everything."

"Our _ways?_ "

"The way we conduct ourselves."

"Oh, so you think it has us pieced together."

"I know it to be true."

Hux stopped. "That's what has you so concerned?"

Kylo stared, without any hint of his usual anger and resentment and annoyance, and said, "Do you think we are very easy men to piece together, General?"

* * *

They were not very easy men to piece together, and that was what worried him the most. A Ghost was enough of a threat all alone, but armed with knowledge, about the First Order, about their movements, their leaders - that was beyond dangerous. Allowing such a thing to continue would be borderline treason, even in eyes other than Snoke's own.

He wanted it to.

By all the gods, he wanted it to. Never had he been so intrigued - so engaged - in his entire life; and Hux felt it too, he knew. He could see it in the way his eyes glittered in the dim light, the eager, determined set of his mouth, just bridging on a smirk. Slight, but to Kylo, it couldn't have shone brighter.

This was what he joined the Knights for. Learning about the Force, encountering the rare and the unexpected, not sitting aboard a ship, twiddling his thumbs and terrorising mindless village sheep.

"What has you so excited?" asked Hux.

"A break from this droll bureaucracy."

"'Droll bureaucracy?'" Hux snorted. "You're quite something, Knight Ren."

"I aim to be."

"Certainly you do," Hux said, dry, but in the Force he was pleased. Kylo couldn't imagine why. That he would play up to the General's vision of his overdone theatrics? That he would display any emotion aside from his usual empty stoicism? If they were to work together, on a case such as this especially, then Hux would soon have to find out that Kylo Ren was not a hollowed-out tin can. Beneath his robes, he bled. Perhaps that was what pleased him; finding a weakness.

"Relax, that was a compliment, for once." Hux waved a hand. "Your intrigue is refreshing. This ship is filled to the brim with boring little followers. Sometimes I seek a little entertainment, and this Ghost has brought it."

"And if it, too, turns out to be a 'boring little follower?'"

"Then this was worth the shot. It might keep us from going insane - well, it might keep _me_ from going insane. Of course, it's too late in your case."

And suddenly it didn't get under Kylo's skin at all. Suddenly this was such an escape from the endless sameness of the _Finalizer._ "I'm flattered."

"Of course you would be."

* * *

The Ghost led them and led them and Kylo was beginning to protest being forced to put one foot after the other like some repentant child, when he saw the door to his own quarters. Hux's were across the way, untouched. The Ghost's shadow lay only across _his_ door, a shadowy hand playing at the intercomm beside it.

"Well, perhaps your self-centred thinking has gotten us somewhere, after all," said Hux. "Back to your own living quarters. Truly, what a journey, and for such an important cause."

"It might be."

Hux stared.

"It could be."

"What possible reason does it have to come here, Ren? Your quarters are filled with absolutely nothing."

"Many ancient Sith artefacts lie here."

"And they wouldn't have shown themselves sooner?"

"Perhaps not."

"There's only one way to find out," Hux began. "But this doesn't excuse your complete recklessness. Proceed with caution."

"You underestimate me," Kylo said, and stepped forward.

* * *

It was cold. The dust blew in gusts around his bedsheets, despite the internal thermostat's position pointing firmly to off, despite the complete lack of draft on a vacuum-sealed ship in the darkness of space. The Ghost had a flair for the dramatic. They were not the only one.

Hux had no subtlety in these matters. "Show yourself!"

Kylo motioned for him to quiet, lessen the risk of provoking the Ghost, but he simply shook his head. "They deserve what's coming to them after what a show they've put on."

"You're not wrong." But Kylo itched to leave, suddenly. There was a sick feeling rising in his chest, like ice in his veins and bile in his throat, and he knew there was a presence here of even greater power than the Supreme Leader. He wanted to run, he wanted to fight, he wanted to _know and understand._

Hux's breath came in sharp pants, each exhale painting the air in little gusts. He pulled his gloves tighter on each hand. "You know, in all the years I've spent in command, I've come to learn to trust any and all instincts. And do you know what they're telling me right now, Ren?"

"To leave, if you have any sense. To challenge, if you're like me. To _talk,_ if you're worse."

"All three at the same time, I imagine."

"Something we can agree on."

Wisps of cold air blew through his quarters and into his meditation room. Kylo could see as his breath made its way towards the door and out of sight. "Shall we follow it?" Hux asked, and then he walked forward without waiting for a response.

Kylo swallowed down apprehension and let caution stay. Only caution, no fear, no challenge, no curiosity. He followed until he hit Hux in the back, smashing his nose into the thick greatcoat. Hux stood to the side, to allow Kylo some sight. A figure stood at the final resting place of what was left of Darth Vader's battle armour. Kylo could only see his hands, and a strand of hair, perhaps, beneath the thick robes. It knelt to fasten its boots, as if it needed them, and then plucked the helmet from its stand with ease, for something so lacking in weight or form.

"A shame its lost its shine in its old age," said the Ghost, cradling the helmet in translucent hands. The voice was quiet, but Kylo felt it like a physical force. He found no air left in his lungs. "Grandson." Anakin Skywalker's - Darth Vader's - apparition tilted its head. "The duty to teach you lies now on my shoulders."

"My Grandfather, my Master. It is an honour."

A hint of humour in a young face with old eyes. "Believe me, the pleasure's mine."

Hux's hands fell to his sides, then rose again to point accusingly at Grandfather's shimmering figure. "What the hell is this?"

Kylo felt, for the first time in many years, that he might be a little impressed. "You can see him?"

Hux only snorted, blissfully unaware of the unlocked world he'd left untouched for so long. "What, do you think this is another of your paranoid delusions, Ren, or are you suggesting your madness is spreading?"

Vader considered them. "You have a great many things to learn." A huff, like a laugh. "To forget the power of the Light, I know. To forget to recognise the Force in others?" And then, Kylo watched in terror as Darth Vader smirked. "Well, colour me surprised. So, 'Kylo' Ren, Ben Solo," and the unspoken quotes around his name made him blink, "tell me, how does being a little less clueless sound?"

* * *

 **Author's Note:** Vader acts like Anakin to piss Kylo off let's be real. No but seriously 'kylo?' like how pretentious are you gonna get man? that's almost as pretentious as 'vader' itself. darth ren would've been more acceptable for chrissakes. you're trying to get taken seriously right buddy? you think kylo's gonna get you that? look at this asshole piece of trash. i love him.

Fuckery aside, sorry it took me such a long time to update. You ever have a crisis about where you want to go with a story? Yeah, that's me, but every day. I have less clues than Ben goddamn Solo, it's fantastic, and it certainly makes for a coherent story with a coherent narrative and a coherent tone. This fic contains complete and consistent coherency, you can trust in me.


	3. Rest

Kylo stood, and then he collapsed against the sagging bedframe and felt his mind race. Hux soon joined him, face cradled in his hands, sweat beading at his temples and wetting his fingers. Neither of them said anything.

Vader's ghost waited patiently. He examined the helmet some more, rotated it in a full circle, noting every speck of dust, and then set it back on its stand. He didn't look surprised, or confused, from what little Kylo could see beneath the hooded robes. Part of him stung that he could be so predictable, but another insisted that he should expect nothing less from Darth Vader.

Finally, after Kylo counted seventy-five taps of their feet, Vader threw back his hood and _saw_ them. He looked like Kylo, in a way that honoured him - they had the same uncooperative hair, the same body language, and Kylo saw his smirk on Vader's mouth. Vader wore his scars differently, with years of practiced care, and his eyes were... strange. Kylo saw his uncle's eye colour, some of his uncle's warmth, but his mother's anger. It was all his mother's anger.

"You act as if I haven't seen this before," Vader said, finally. He wasn't looking at either of them, but back at the mask. Kylo removed his own, in a show of respect, and Vader raised an eyebrow. "I could acclaim your taste. But thirty years of reflection paint your memories a different light, and I know now what I didn't then."

"Do you intend to teach me? The true power of the Force?"

Vader laughed at this, equal parts genuine and mocking. Kylo couldn't tell which. "You are so like me," he said, and Kylo dipped his head.

"You honour me, Grandfather."

"You misunderstand. You are too much like me. You make all the same mistakes and blind yourself to all the same lessons." Vader waved a hand, still gently whirring metal, despite his lacking physical form. "You discard Ben Solo as I discarded Anakin Skywalker. Do not; it is not worth the time, nor the effort."

"Ben Solo was weak."

"You cannot deny the Light in you, as you cannot deny the Dark. Accept both and move forward to become stronger."

"Ben Solo _had_ no strength."

"Did the Empire discredit Anakin Skywalker's contributions to the Clone Wars, despite its greatest asset's insistence on their recklessness and lack of foresight?"

"But Anakin Skywalker was always Darth Vader."

Kylo half expected anger, half pride at this statement, but Vader simply snorted. "Such a narrow view. Yes, we are one, in that each was only a half of the other. I tore myself apart and ignored each unwanted remnant in succession. You are doing that now, Grandson."

"Snoke told me-"

"You _listen_ to the words that tumble out of that zealot's mouth?"

"He is the Supreme Leader-!"

"He is a bumbling fool." Vader was sneering. "As the Emperor Palpatine was a bumbling fool. Arrogance and pride and overconfidence in their own strength. They refuse to acknowledge their limits or nurture their alliances, and that is why they fail. Always." At this, Vader hummed. "In fact," he said, pointing to Hux, "you, the Force burns bright within you. You would be wise to offer your talents to a more deserving party."

"The First Order is thriving under my hand-" Hux began, but Vader simply shook his head.

"That is precisely why you must leave. It is your hand that guides it, not Snoke's. You should answer to no-one but yourself if you wish to achieve your true goals. Listen to some, yes, but pledge yourself to them? No. Never."

Hux reeled. "Are you implying Snoke is doing absolutely nothing to help the First Order?"

"I am not implying it, I am stating it outright. As it is the truth and will always remain the truth."

Kylo frowned. "Grandfather, I would never doubt your words, but these accusations-"

"Are a lot to take in? Perhaps. But I find this is a loss of balance you can easily regain."

Kylo wanted to scream. _No, no, I have fought for this! I have given up everything for the Dark!_ But Grandfather was the greatest Sith to live and breathe this galaxy, and Kylo could never question the great mind that saw through what he and Hux could not. Instead, he asked, "What will you have me do, Grandfather?"

"Do not forget Ben Solo. Do not disrespect what he once stood for."

"I-"

"I did it, didn't I? After all, I spent as much time Anakin as I did Vader. I've seen the merits of both, and lemme tell you," Anakin's grin was menacing, "use both, you're better for it." The grin was gone as fast as it came. "That is all I have time for now. The rest of my family calls to me." An accusing finger, swiftly fading, aimed itself in their direction. "Do not disregard what you have heard here today."

And then he was gone.

Hux began to laugh.

* * *

"All this time-" Hux choked. "All this time! And I didn't know! I could have achieved so much more in so much less time. I could have rid you of your ridiculous grandstanding-" Kylo growled at this, but Hux just scoffed. "Don't deny it's ridiculous grandstanding, Ren. The Force can clearly be used for much greater things than intimidating all your little followers. We can do _so much._ I could raise the Empire from its ashes and rule it myself."

"You are leaping to conclusions, General."

And now, Kylo saw as Hux grew angry. A fuming, frothing kind of anger Kylo knew intimately. It drove him to the consoles with his blade, but it seemed it drove Hux to a wild line of vicious revelations. "As quickly as you leap to stop blasterbolts, you theatric, peacocking, _powerful_ fool. Your dead grandfather - Hah! I sound like a madman already - he's right. Stop playing the crowd like strings and learn to work with the force you consider to be a particularly large gathering of puppets, waiting kindly for your oh-so-kind, oh-so-generous hand up their arse." Hux's nose was wrinkled with the intensity of his sneer. "Did Darth Vader mention you were _ignoring_ an entire half of the Force's power? What kind of shallow creature _are_ you, to pass up such an opportunity over, what, pride?"

"Supreme Leader Snoke said it should be so-"

"Not every word that comes out of that man's mouth is law, Ren! Even _I,_ his precious little workdog, realise this."

Kylo quieted. Hux was right that no man's word was law; or rather, every man's. In this galaxy, law was the subjective piece in the artisan's collection, the one free to interpretation. Kylo had never believed Snoke's word was, by default, truth, but he had believed Snoke to be right, on many things. Snoke was wiser and older and had watched the galaxy burn, die, and reform into the slow-glowing embers made from its own ashes.

But so had Grandfather.

"Don't stumble around like a kicked puppy, Ren, when the solution is clear. Judge for yourself who gives the better guidance."

"And you, General? What will you do with such a monumental realisation?"

"You are a student of the Force yourself, correct? I would choose your own teacher, but from where I'm standing, my friend, it seems your grandfather offers a lot to learn, more even than the Supreme Leader. He has 'lived' longer, and has seen and participated in perhaps even greater historical events than those any of us still alive today have had the pleasure of so much as witnessing."

"So you won't ignore it?"

" _'Ignore it?'_ " Hux burst into high and mocking laughter. "I have a new weapon to hone, and you suggest I leave it to rust instead?"

"Some would prefer so. The Force is- it can be dangerous, and overwhelming."

Hux simply looked at him as if he were punishingly dimwitted. "My life has been dangerous and overwhelming since the day I took my first breath."

* * *

Kylo was due to report to Snoke in a few cycles, and yet something in him had begun to unfurl doubt after doubt after doubt. He no longer felt the same intense eagerness to hear the Supreme Leader's wisdom. He wanted to speak again to Grandfather, or to Hux - whose knowledge of the Force was so minuscule it was beyond seeing, and yet whose understanding of its true uses was so great in so little time.

Kylo wanted to talk to Hux, to train him, or to train _with_ him. Before, he had wanted to squeeze at Hux's neck until he could no longer draw that breath he heralded, that had overcome his dangerous and overwhelming circumstances. Now, Hux was a puzzle he wanted to solve. Or a book whose pages he could not read. Kylo wanted Hux to trust in him enough to read those pages aloud.

He had no idea where this urge to prove himself had come from. From Hux's casual dismissal of his capabilities, perhaps, or the shame borne from his thorough chastising by Grandfather. He had thought himself so right in his grasp of the Force. He was still more skilled than the streetchildren who used it to steal them half-rotten food, but now he felt barely a step up, like a schoolboy, back in Uncle Luke's temple.

Desperately, he searched the Force for Hux's unique signature, a spark of fire, the smell of expensive cologne, and, when he was particularly angry, the feel of a finely-tailored uniform soaking in blood.

The spark burned bright several decks above, in Kylo's custom training room. He had commissioned it when the minds of his officers had become too distracting. The Stormtroopers always shook and reeked of hurt and ache when they practiced their regimens. Kylo could barely stand it. And now Hux was once again invading the only space he had to himself.

He stood up, surging with, not anger, but curiosity.

* * *

Hux was stretched into an elegantly lethal pose when Kylo arrived, a wooden sword gripped in one hand, aimed straight at the blank, empty face of a standard training holo. Kylo recognised immediately a strange blend of rigid military custom and ancient lightsaber combat forms. He could see the point where the two merged, soldier and Force-user. One who would use it not only as a tool, but as a weapon.

"I hope you don't mind that I'm borrowing your room. It's not in the First Order's interest to hoard such resources to oneself, you know."

"They are not solely for myself. Had I truly been intent on keeping you out, you would certainly not find yourself anywhere within this entire deck's vicinity."

"Tell me, with enough practice, would I be able to push through your greedy boundaries, to find the room despite your best efforts? Am I of that calibre? Or am I simply able to suspend my morning caf in the air for the few seconds it takes to clear away cutlery?"

Kylo examined the spark. Now, it was small because it was confused. He could feel its desire, its need to rage and burn into an unstoppable firestorm. It reached to lick at his hands and singe his fingertips. It could, and would, chew through him and use him as fuel should he feel the need to let it.

"My grandfather was correct in his assessment. You have great potential within you. I am unable to tell what will limit you and what will not; you know too little as of now."

"Then I will continue to practice," Hux said, and resumed his stance.

"You will not be using this room unaccompanied, General. I have my own routine to attend to."

"I think we can manage a little civility in our training, hmmm? Or would you like to spar?"

Kylo had no trouble understanding the implication behind the words. Hux knew little of the Force, but he lived and breathed fighting as he lived and breathed overwhelming danger. It was his birthright, passed down in blood through generations and generations of Hux's before him.

"Greatly so. But first, I must address my own personal schedule."

"Does it require great silence?"

"If you feel the need to blast the holofeed at maximum volume, General, you are free to do so. Though I would prefer some measure of peace."

"You're above needing such base things as a little quiet, aren't you?"

"Only younglings let this hinder them." Kylo huffed.

"We'll see about that," said Hux, and his mouth set into a small, challenging half-smile, just a slight upturn to his lips.

This was a challenge Kylo could most certainly accept.

* * *

As he had expected, Hux could fight. By all the gods, could he fight. Kylo was so sick of pummelling people into the floor, he wanted to taste his own blood as well as others', that was a true battle. A victory in a battle of equals was even more worthy of respect, and at its least, respect was what he wanted - demanded - from all his command. He wanted honour and glory, but those were won.

Arguably, respect was also won, but considering Kylo was, in fact, anyone's superior officer in the first place meant he had _already_ earnt enough respect alone.

After seeing no clear winner in the hours they'd fought, Kylo had sat down to rest, and to ignore the hunger gnawing its way through him. And, of course, Hux's frustrating stare.

"Do you have something you wish to ask, General?"

"You're..." Hux tapped his fingers in rhythms against the training mat, brows furrowed, mouth turned down by just a slight degree. "You're hungry," Hux said, finally settling. He seemed incredibly pleased with himself. He looked rather like a cat.

Hux scoffed. "I do not."

"No matter, General. I, too-"

"You're too much a cat," Hux interrupted. "I've already one to deal with-"

"And now you have another," Kylo said. He hadn't meant for it to come out like an offer than a statement of fact, but his balance had been shaken by Grandfather's appearance, and still he could not mask everything he felt. Clearly, not enough at least for Hux to miss.

"And now I have another," Hux repeated. "I'm not feeding you my rations just because you forgot to bring yours."

"But what if I asked nicely?"

"You never do."

No, he supposed he didn't. "It's not a rule of mine. Really, rules were made to be broken, don't you think, Hux?"

"Unless you're directly sabotaging all my efforts."

"Please?"

Hux threw a protein bar at Kylo's face, which he gracefully caught, inches before it could smack him in the nose. "Thank you."

"No compliments for the method of delivery?"

"It could've used a few improvements."

* * *

Hux was at the door at an absurd hour of the morning, and Kylo merely waved it open, and went back to the comfort of his pillow. "I assume you're here to demand I train you, or that Grandfather take you on as well."

"Did you read my mind?"

"Did I have to?" Kylo yawned. "Yes. You'll be surprised to find I am not so much a child as not to share my toys."

"Or in this case, your undead family."

"Yes, my undead family. Considering we share blood, you should call upon Darth Vader at a later hour. After all, if I break a few consoles when I'm awoken too early in the morning cycle, what do you think Vader himself might do?"

Hux glared. "Be a reasonable adult."

"You take no losses, do you? And you are... very set on making this happen."

"I've been given a gift, and I am not going to spend any further second of my life throwing it aside."

"I will teach you when Grandfather cannot," Kylo promised, and held up a finger. "And no, I will not patronise you. You are leagues above those I patronise, and that is simply fact. It is not to feed your ego."

"I will accept your lessons if you keep to your word."

And Kylo felt honesty bubble up within him. "I am only a learner myself. We both will benefit immeasurably from Grandfather's tutelage."

"Has he, in fact, agreed to give it?"

"I don't- I don't know. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to call on him. The Supreme Leader schedules all meetings, but Grandfather's tactics have always been purposefully unpredictable."

Hux smirked. "Perhaps if we wish upon the stars hard enough."

"I will teach you how to seek out his presence, and those of others. In a few hours. Feel free to eat my morning rations. I repay my debts."

"'Debts.' You consider a protein bar a debt?"

"Yes, General. Rations are a commodity, even to me."

"Very well. Once you've regained consciousness, come find me streaming from your holofeed and eating your rations. Then we can ask for your grandfather."

"Agreed," said Kylo, and went back to sleep.

* * *

 **Author's Note:** I am in Crack Treated Seriously!Fic hell again. I will never be free, and to be honest, I don't want to be.

Watch as this spirals out of control just as all my other fics have.

SHAKY. I WILL DRAG YOU RIGHT FROM THE PT INTO THE ST, I SWEAR. You are my enabler and I am yours. This mess is still all your fault. Thank you. xox

(As always, feel free to point out any errors or disagreements in characterisation! I write these all when I've had far too little sleep to be healthy. Seriously. Kylo is a hungry cat and Hux is an exasperated one. Such things can only come from sleep deprivation-addled brains.)


	4. Starwish

As promised, Hux was browsing distractedly through Kylo's holofeed when he awoke. The other half of his attention was focused on one of Kylo's most prized holocrons, which was somehow on his table and not in his meditation room where it belonged. It was, in fact, a Sith Lord's teachings on contacting the dead. How Hux had known this was unknown to him.

"I went through them all," Hux said. "Skimmed, shall I say. I was looking for one about communicating with the dead, and lo and behold." He held it up. "It helps that it was among the first in your collection, and the least dusty. Trust you to spend lengthy amounts of time practicing _necromancy._ "

"You managed to open them?"

"It is like any other exercise." Hux huffed. "Not that they say much in particular. You must be contacting a spirit united with the Living Force after death, they must want to talk to you, etcetera."

"There is not as much to it as you might think."

"Mmm, I am beginning to see that." He hummed. "Do we really have to wish upon a star for your grandfather to deign us with his presence?"

"Do not mock him," Kylo snapped.

"He likely doesn't appreciate your commendable defence of his honour, you know. We all gleaned from him that he could, in fact, very much do that himself. Quite brutally, too. Have you seen the holofootage? Truly remarkable, that level of skill."

"Yes. It is what I hope to achieve one day."

"You've got the brutality down to a fine art," Hux said, wryly. "Now spend four decades in rigid, hard-set Force training. From the Jedi to the Sith, and from a light frame to a hulking mass of armour. A portable life support system, really. Now that is experience."

"I have dedicated my life to it."

Hux tilted his head. He hadn't much shielding, and Kylo could feel intrigue from him. He could hear the unsaid, _"You are so strange. I want to take you apart and see how you work."_ Hux was studying him. And so he was studying Hux.

Who, as it seemed, had such devotion to learning the Force that he had gone through the personal artefacts of a Knight of Ren. Kylo was impressed at the level of blatant disaffection.

"Shall we?" Kylo asked, and folded himself neatly against the floor. "Close your eyes and think."

"I'll just imagine the wheezing sound of his breathing, shall I?"

"He lost his voice in battle. The Force honoured him despite the loss, and he found a better one."

"The other has more of a ring to it." But Hux sat, closed his eyes, and rested his hands lightly on his bent knees.

Kylo thought of the things he wanted to ask, and to tell, and to do. He thought of the burnt shell of a mask, of his Grandfather's voice, of his strange, mocking humour, the perpetually-amused tone.

And slowly, before them, a light faded in with all the glare of sun on snow, and there stood Anakin Skywalker, one eyebrow still raised, entertained. "You wish to begin your training now?"

"And the General?"

"Is free to learn as he wishes. But we will not be fighting today."

"There's more to the Force than force, I see." Hux said it more to himself, but a small, odd little grin appeared on Grandfather's face. It looked as if he were making an effort _not_ to laugh.

Kylo couldn't remember the last time he had laughed in genuine.

"You have yet to be disappointed. Let us keep it that way."

* * *

True to his word, Grandfather taught them nothing of battle. He insisted, instead, that they learn to harness their wildest emotions. Kylo wasn't so blind as to miss the disapproval in his master's voice.

"Think of your anger as an elegant weapon, as opposed to a blunt tool," he said, sagely, curled and hovering lightly in the air, as if on an invisible bed. Though he was restful, Kylo could sense he wasn't bored. "You strike thoughtlessly. Everything in your path cannot be reasoned with, and so you destroy it. This will get you nowhere."

"Are you suggesting I try to attempt diplomacy?"

Something lit in his eyes. "I'd like to see you _try._ " And then the flame was pinched. Kylo found the moments Vader allowed the Light to return the most unsettling; even more so than his presence in the Force as the greatest of the Sith, even more so than if he stood in full armour and crushed invisible hands against his neck. "No, I suggest you learn patience, as every good apprentice should. Your partner in the Force," at this, Grandfather waved a hand to Hux, standing pleased to see Kylo openly humiliated, "would likely appreciate your efforts more if they ended without costly damages to his ship."

Kylo bowed. "I understand."

"Such formalities are unnecessary," Grandfather said, and wiped a hand over his face. "I am your blood."

Kylo stood blankly.

Finally, something snapped in Grandfather's calm posture. "For Forcesake, _knock it out_."

That was not the violent outburst he had been expecting. "I am- sorry?"

"I try to appeal to the Dark in you and you try to kiss my kriffing boots, Force, if Snips were here to see the state of my apprentices now-" Grandfather settled. "Maybe I should try appealing to the Light in you, instead. Quit with the formalities, stick to the... youth I once was."

"I don't think acting like the reckless hero Anakin Skywalker will get you any further," Hux offered. "Ren has difficulty understanding duality. All he sees is Dark. It's all very melodramatic."

"Well, I can do melodramatic." Grandfather hummed.

"General, are you implying there is anything but Darkness in Darth Vader? He understands its true power, unlike y-"

"I was the one to bring balance to the Force," Grandfather said. "I understand the true power of the Dark, and the Light. It would be less wasteful and useless to simply accept both."

"This is what you are trying to teach us?"

Hux snorted. "I'm sorry to say your grandson's slow, but well..."

"Quiet!" Kylo snapped, and Hux, damn him, just smirked.

"That's no way to speak to your superior officer."

"Y'know," Grandfather began. "Y'know, at this point, I'm not trying to teach you anything. I'm just trying to prove an exaggerated point. That point being that I have two personalities to choose from at any given time. As you can see." He frowned. "Snoke has taught you to fixate on only one. Such is a limited understanding of your birthright."

"My birthright, Grandfather?"

"Decades of knowledge in the Force passed down into your own hands, whether you intend to open them or not."

"I asked you to show me the power of the Dark."

"And I am," he allowed. "But I can show you the power of the Light, as well. Do not pretend as if you don't feel its call as strongly as your desperate clinging to the Dark would suggest. And if you choose, in turn, to ignore an entire half of my offer, then you are a fool, and you have much to learn before you can even attempt manouevres above a Padawan's level."

Kylo blinked back. "As you request."

"A start." Grandfather smiled, slight. "You, General, do you intend to ignore the other side of the Force?"

"If it gets me somewhere above Snoke's thumb and forefinger, I plan on doing it. If it means bringing flowers to the streetchildren of Ryloth, then so be it."

"An admirable dedication, if for reasons unrelated to idealism or hope."

"What would you know of idealism and hope?" Kylo asked.

"I had hope, once. Never idealism, but once I hoped for a better future. They were hopes I never thought to act upon until now."

"You are implying _we_ are the better future?"

"My son is... you have taken a great deal from him. His spirit went untouched after I returned to the Light, but you succeeded where I failed. You have truly broken him, and so he has grown old and cynical, as we all do. But you, you are young, and your mind is pliable. You have proven as much."

"You want to mould me into a vision of idealism?" Kylo spat.

"Yes," said Grandfather. "What reason do I have to lie to you? I want you to find true Balance, as I did. I want to see my bloodline remain untainted by the cultish rallying of such scum as your _'Supreme Leader'_ Snoke."

"You fell for the same trap." Hux stepped in, now, eyes wide and pleased. He had found something he could hold over Vader. His eyes always shone the same way when he found a weakness to exploit - like some preying nexu. Kylo had learnt early on what it meant to find oneself on the other end of that gaze. It never meant well. "With Emperor Palpatine. You don't want him to make the same mistakes. You want to prove your blood isn't so gullible as to fall for the same trick twice."

Vader's teeth glinted on unknown light. "You are sharp for a military brat."

Kylo twisted and fed on the molten outrage that arose from Hux's assumption, and spun around, spitting. "You call me gullible! I am not the one who follows orders like a good little pet and obeys the useless posturing of the hierarchy! You hypocrite, you-"

"Oh, that's not an implication you like particularly, is it?" Hux hummed. "Then I suppose you should take up your grandfather's offer."

Kylo felt abruptly as if he had been played. Vader's grin grew even further.

* * *

Grandfather, for the most part, left them to their own devices. He had brushed away the thought that they might need supervision, as they were not "sniveling younglings", but insisted he check up on their progress from time to time.

They were alone with Grandfather's ambiguous guidance and hundreds of Sith holocrons, and Hux had greedy hands.

Kylo would rather tell him himself the meaning of the Dark, but Hux insisted on consuming information like rations. He never stopped, not to eat, to rest, only to attend to his command duties and complete his daily training regimen. Kylo admired the drive. Of course, it also proved he and Hux were truly partners in the Force, now, and that meant proper communication. If he ever found the need for a mental link, Hux would have to dampen his hate enough to lower his barriers.

Kylo had to earn his respect, and his cooperation.

Frankly, he would rather have carried an entire Star Destroyer across the sandpits of Jakku.

* * *

He knew he would have to broach the topic, and soon, but going about asking permission to form a path of psychic communication through the Force was not something he had any particular experience in.

Hux looked up from his datapad. "I know you're dying to ask something, Ren. Ask away and be done with it, for Maker's sake."

"Most training pairs tend to communicate in the Force telepathically," Kylo began. "They make a conscious effort to broadcast their thoughts and intentions to their partner."

"For better coordination and efficiency?" Hux asked. "That seems reasonable."

"It means we will have to spend a great deal of time in each other's heads, General." Kylo tilted his head. "You don't like me. This does not facilitate easy conversation."

"If you stop wrecking my equipment and interfering in my operations, I'll have no problems with you at all."

"You hate me," Kylo began, but Hux just snorted.

"I hate everyone. It's the most logical and obvious choice, until proven otherwise. You're strange, Ren, but you have goals, which is far more than I can say for half this crew. That infernal mask does ruin any aura of approachability, though, if you were truly wondering why no-one is willing to strike up a pleasant chat."

Kylo hesitated. Would honesty win Hux's trust earlier? "My face is too..."

"Young? Do you think _I_ care either way what you wear, Ren? If you act like a child, some unnecessarily melodramatic robes will not conceal it."

"You have barely seen my face."

Hux raised an eyebrow and returned his gaze to his holocron. "Is that not what you were going to say?"

"Will you pretend as if you didn't already know if I tell you?" A part of Kylo was amused, even past Hux's blatant disrespect. Not many could claim to lack the cowardice to stand up to him, and Hux was, as always, refreshing. Infuriating, but refreshing. Kylo didn't know whether to kill him or to kill Snoke and let Hux take his place.

"Age is irrelevant. You are either a fool or you aren't." Hux considered him. "Maybe you're not such a fool. You do have some incredible and frankly impressive issues with posturing, though."

"It's my job. The First Order must bow to me."

"You admit your intimidation tactics aren't subconscious?" Hux clapped his hands together, just once. "Will wonders never cease?"

"That's not-" Kylo stopped. "Hmm. Well played, General. Maybe you will not be such a dull presence in my mind, after all."

Hux set the holocron down. "Go on," he said. "I know you're just dying to teach me."

* * *

Kylo hated how eager he was to teach, to share the Force. He knew Hux could see it as clear as day, especially without the mask, or the vocoder. It was easier to explain the many techniques he'd learnt over the years with his face uncovered, but it left him open and vulnerable for Hux's disturbingly accurate perception. With or without the Force's aid, Hux stared straight through him.

"This explains how Force users never tend to trip over each other in battle. They all have this constant awareness? With or without the link, this is impossible to ignore."

Kylo resisted shuddering as he felt Hux rifle through his mind. He thought of nothing but mundane, blank and empty experiences, and hoped Hux could only skim the surface. It was a shallow hope, but he hoped it nonetheless. "It's an immense help, yes. A shame none of our Stormtroopers can achieve such fluidity without decades of training."

"I am beginning to suspect the two of us are match enough for an entire army, even one of the First Order's magnitude."

A part of him sung at the words, and Hux paused. "It isn't just for your ego, is it? You genuinely like when others reassure you of your own competence. You _want_ to share this, you _want_ others to understand the true nature of your abilities."

Kylo set a foot into the waters of Hux's own mind, to even out the sneaking, intrusive tendrils in his own. "And you... want to be my equal? No, you believe you already are. You... want to reach my level of power in the Force? Is that it?"

Hux twitched. "If I am to rule the First Order, it becomes necessary."

"It can be done," Kylo said. "Grandfather's training will raise us far above Snoke's level."

He could feel a jolt of vindictive pleasure at this, shooting through Hux's mind, leaving him to fight a self-satisfied smirk. "He's growing far too old for his position, I think."

Kylo could bite back his father's blunt honesty when he had the time to curb it, but in the depths of his own mind, it was left unchecked. _We are better together than we are alone. We are a stronger force._

"I do admit, our petty disagreements are nothing in comparison to the benefits of a shared willpower. Besides, despite the disordered chaos of your mind, you are-"

 _The fire to your ice?_

"What a purple metaphor, Ren. I'm impressed, but not surprised." _Still,_ Kylo heard. _Not entirely inaccurate. Rather apt, I suppose._

This was the strength in numbers the Jedi so insisted was critical to the ways of the Force.

It didn't leave as bad a taste in his mouth as he'd thought. Not in the company of someone with some degree of intelligence, unlike the peons that served them.

He _enjoyed_ it. Greedy mental hands wanted to pull Hux in further and explore everything his head could offer. If his interpretation was correct, it was a thirst for knowledge the General also shared. Grandfather was right to see an alliance between them. With this, they could accomplish anything, Kylo was suddenly sure. Had this been what Grandfather had felt in his youth, fighting at the side of Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi? An intoxicating rush of power, and yet he'd given it all up for the useless Emperor Palpatine.

Just as he had with Snoke.

Only Kylo had the pleasure of learning from his predecessor's mistakes. Blood could beget blood, but he had the upper hand. He knew how this would play out. Hux and his rule would mould into the dream Vader and his true master could never achieve.

"Oh, I _like_ this," Hux said, losing the fight to his rapidly-growing smirk. "A plan, for once. And such a good one, too."

* * *

 **Author's Note:** Sorry for the delay! Finals week is approaching, and I may be slightly terrified. It's hard to work on fic when you're chugging coffee and writing essays at three in the morning. I'm trying super hard to get these out as fast as I can, but I don't want to give you guys anything but... well, this isn't really a quality product, is it? This is me being self-indulgent. But only the greatest self-indulgence makes it onto the page! Basically. It's a seal of quality over quantity. Even if that quality is just me rambling about how cool the Force is? shit. the force is so fucking cool.

so fucking cool man.

xxoo


	5. Dedication

Grandfather appeared to hover above them at expressly inconvenient moments during crucial training, and then gave his unbridled approval of their partnership.

It was frustrating. But Kylo knew where he was attempting to lead them, to the same bond he'd had with his master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Though, in the eyes of the Council, long dead as they were, Hux and Kylo were only padawans.

Grandfather liked to make that very clear.

"Don't wield the Force like an impatient youngling," he said. "Look at the General's patience. Emulate it."

Kylo had practiced basic exercises since he was little more than a boy. If anyone knew patience in the Force, it was him. His patience with the Force was perfect. The pleasure of testing that balance fell to his idiot subordinates. So clueless, so busy snivelling and never doing enough work. How dare Grandfather lecture him on something he knew so well, and Hux so little.

"Stop that whining, Ren, it certainly won't get you anywhere." Hux had one foot balanced perfectly on the room's upper support bar, the other laid to rest at his knee. He didn't shake, or wobble, and in the Force the scent of blood was not so suffocating. He was calm.

"Forgive me, Grandfather. The crew distracts me. It's... incompetent."

Grandfather laughed. "Not all. If you cannot trust in your command to properly and expressly execute your orders, then do the work yourself."

"I sent them to retrieve a map months ago. Still they haven't returned to me with anything more than the bodies of slain 'Troopers. As if enough of their blood could possibly paint the path to what I must find."

Something intensely curious lit in Grandfather's eyes. "Where does this map lead?"

"To my uncle, to your son."

"And what reason have you to seek my son? Simple curiosity cannot cause this level of indiscretion. You've turned over half the galaxy in your efforts."

"He is our blood. I want knowledge." Kylo bowed. "You have all my respect, but there exist some things in this world only Luke Skywalker knows."

Grandfather raised an eyebrow. "That is true. He trained you; the second to do so, after your mother. Do you plan to use his own techniques against him?"

"I don't want to harm my uncle. I only want to share in his wisdom."

"And yet your Supreme Leader wants you to throw your father to the hungry dogs that lie in wait at the end of this life."

Kylo looked away. The order was one that had torn him apart at the seams, but he hadn't let a single soul in on his internal war. Snoke would execute him. The crew would recoil from his very presence. Hux would mock him indefinitely.

And yet Han Solo was still his father.

"I'd pay a countless million credits to see the day the Supreme Leader orders my own father's death," Hux said, mouth curled into an ugly snarl.

"Brendol Hux I?"

"The one and the only."

Kylo hesitated. To ask personal questions was to risk Hux's small pinch of trust. "I take it... you did not have a strong relationship with him?"

Hux practically spat on the floor below him. "He was right about many things. Training an army effectively, with no doubt. But terrible with names, truly unoriginal. To think, Brendol Armitage Hux II - my name, in all its glory. Could you possibly get any more egotistical than naming your own son after yourself? He was right about work ethic. About centring oneself. But he was not fit for parenthood, with inversely as much talent as he could raise an army from a group of shaking, yellow-hearted cowards." He hummed. "In short, my relationship with my father is no better than yours, Ren, and that really is saying something, believe me."

Kylo hid his wince. The comparison was unpleasant to consider, in the least. But the knowledge was valuable. One more piece to the puzzle he had gained, though he hadn't yet placed any one of those pieces on the board.

He had no idea where to start.

* * *

Hux crossed his legs and set his hands on the table. Kylo paused in eating his protein bar to spare a moment's attention Hux's way. "I've been thinking," Hux said, pleased to have the spotlight shining once more upon him. "I've been thinking we ought to have a strategy. What we're doing is treason, you're aware, I'm sure."

"To avoid suspicion?"

"And everything that comes with it."

"Our deaths," Kylo said. Hux looked at him sourly. "It's a good idea. But we barely have the resources for its execution."

"We have our own minds."

"You want us to outsmart Snoke?"

"Precisely so." Hux gave another pleasant smile, like a puppet trying to mimic sentient life. Kylo felt entirely on edge whenever it sought his way. "I'm glad you're catching on so quickly, Ren."

"You're uneasy," said Kylo, instead. "About facing him?"

"He has no question that my loyalty lies solely with myself, but as of yet, I've had no reason to leave. And for a reason such as this, he would gladly see us both vivisected."

The image flashed in Hux's mind, and so in his. He swallowed back bile. "How descriptive."

"Ah, mental reverb? Yes, about this connection. Have you already linked us? If Snoke wants to keep his eye on us, he'll no doubt make sure our stories are in check. I imagine communicating mentally will solve this, as long as he continues to believe I have about as much skill with the Force as a waste disposal worm. Which is the next point I wanted to address, consequently. He must be kept in the dark."

Something in him snickered at the wordplay. He had now the advantage of both, and yet Snoke knew of only one Force, of only the Dark.

"Feeling smug isn't going to help us convince the Supreme Leader I excel in only one area. Knowledge of your precious sorcery isn't subtle, or easy to hide, or as mysterious as you like to think."

"I can only create the link with your permission. Theoretically, it could run one-way, but that would defeat the purpose."

Hux gave an impatient huff. "Well, you have it."

Kylo reached out in a careful twirling thread, for Hux to mentally grasp. Physically, he slipped a hand out of his glove to hold out. "Take it. It will make the process easier."

Hux looked on in obvious distaste, but still, he bared a single hand, and laid two blaster-calloused fingers in Kylo's outstretched palm. When Kylo did not attempt to break them off, he allowed the other three to follow.

Hux's hands had burns from blasterbolts, and Kylo's from countless lightsabers. Despite their animosity, despite their differences, here they were alike. In war.

 _Are you this melodramatic all the time? Maker, I'll barely be able to handle it without losing my own sanity in the crossfire._

 _Nice to see you,_ Kylo returned.

It was like trying to part clouds with his bare hands. The link was strong, stronger than he'd thought, but Hux's mind was shrouded, walled off, and he was using everything he had to keep it that way. Every movement reeked of distrust. Kylo couldn't blame him.

 _You've established the link?_

 _I have._

 _Hmm. Good. This will be able to fool the Supreme Leader. For now, at least. We may have to plan in the longterm, knowing your incredible skills in deceit._

 _Longterm?_

 _Learning the Force doesn't take a day, I assume._

 _No. It doesn't._ He blinked. _I admire your commitment._

Never had he experienced such a connection. It was overwhelming. It was a sensory overload. It was absolutely amazing.

* * *

"We're even," Kylo said. This was the third hour they'd been training, and still they had met each other equally. Still.

Hux considered him briefly. "We are."

The neural link was beyond words. He wondered if this had been what Grandfather truly wanted him to see. To stop him from making the same mistakes, throwing it all always in service to some power-hungry fool. He had sought knowledge beyond Luke searching desperately for the remnants of the dead Jedi. Snoke had given it to him when others couldn't. But now, now he realised the knowledge lay in his blood, and the blood of the dedicated. Like Hux.

"We're matched," Kylo added, hesitantly. He saw the same fervour in Hux, the same wild-eyed drive to know and see. He hadn't seen it in many, and certainly not in the Order. They had a thirst to kill, but they brushed off the true meaning of what they were fighting for. Kylo had fallen prey to it himself, but Hux. Hux had a thirst not just for blood, but to learn, to absorb all new information. It was commendable.

"There's more depth to you than I thought," Hux said. A bead of sweat trailed down his temple and across his cheek, which he brushed away. "You're angry, and just as insane. But you're motivated. Determined. I admire determination." A hum. "You see things through. Admirable."

Kylo bowed his head. "Together, we could achieve anything."

To his surprise, Hux returned the bow. "More than just glory and power, yes? Your ridiculous magic, it offers insight into the workings of this world. The Supreme Leader is always away, hunting for these things. Your ancient artefacts. I think it's high time we try ourselves."

"You would risk leaving the Order?"

"Oh, no. I would take the Order. Snoke no longer owns it. _We_ do."

"You... wish to overthrow his rule?"

Hux smiled, all teeth. "Not that he has much of it, but yes. That is the general idea. Now, I recall you wanted a map. To your uncle's location."

"He's had years, now, to find meaning. After I destroyed him, he rebuilt himself in his work. He couldn't bare to look at others, only the past. He wanted to see what it was the Jedi fought so hard to protect. I want to see what he's learnt."

"Well," said Hux. "There are many places to hide in this galaxy. But we have eyes everywhere. Did you have a lead?"

"A droid. One of the Resistance fighter's. I've been told, for a high price, that it has one of the map's key pieces. The other lies with my mother and father."

"You'll have to get it from them."

"Or from Grandfather. If he truly sees that I want knowledge, he will give up his son's location. Perhaps even his daughter's." Kylo paused. "But you must swear, nobody touches them. Snoke wants them dead."

"You're quite the rebel, aren't you? You want to do everything Snoke's told you not to. You want to keep them alive because he wants to see them gone."

"Not only that," Kylo offered. "They're Skywalker descendants. They've seen things. Things powerful enough to keep them afloat, even after fighting two wars. They're outmatched, underpowered, and small. And yet they go against the Order at every turn."

Hux snarled. "It's a thorn in my side."

"Imagine directing that thorn elsewhere."

"You want an _alliance?_ "

The very small voice that was still Ben Solo whispered to him. He only wanted his family back. Kylo Ren wanted his family's resources.

Hux reconsidered. "You want to retie the knot you cut when you destroyed your uncle's work," he corrected.

"I want what they know."

"You want them to love you again."

Kylo clenched his fists. "I want them to _give_ me that map. I want access to that knowledge."

Hux raised a brow. "And knowledge is power."

"You would contest-"

"No. I wouldn't. But admit what you don't want to admit, Ren. Stop denying it. You want to be accepted back into your own flesh and blood. That's why you're so eager to do as your grandfather says."

"He was a powerful man. He knows things none of us can... possibly fathom."

Hux only stared. "And?"

"And he's all I have left. The only one who understands me."

"You think Mummy doesn't love you anymore? You think she sees you only as some evil little cog in Snoke's machine?"

"She has no reason to think otherwise."

"Then show her. I don't care if you want a heart-to-heart. If you share their knowledge with me I'll even refrain from commenting on your inevitable show of tears when you reunite. I'll turn the First Order from their tail. I know I can control this galaxy better than Emperor Palpatine; I can create order in chaos, where he could not. I don't care about your ridiculous blood feud. I couldn't care any less." He tilted his head. "You scratch my back, I scratch yours. As it goes."

"You want knowledge because it is power? And greater power means greater order?"

"Greater control over my men. Anything I want, I can achieve, with their strength and my own. And, it seems, with yours. If you'll give it."

"And you'll give me free reign. To search for what I want."

"You can go have your little commune with the Jedi. Just lend me your hand, and teach me what you know."

Kylo blinked, then held out a hand. "It's a deal."

Hux gripped it, and shook it once. "So," he said. "Let's get started."

* * *

 **Author's Note:** SEMESTER'S FINALLY FINISHED. YASSSS. But my birthday is rapidly approaching, so I'm sorry for all these delays. I've been having too much fun bathing in the pure, shining starlight that is NOT HAVING TO DO ANYTHING AT ALL. I'M FREE. SO FREE I CAN TASTE IT.

(Enjoy. I hope to be a little speedier next time. xoxo)


	6. Horizonline

Snoke's altar had grown steadily dustier after each visit he and Hux made. No longer did it stand in pristine condition, crystalline rock shining like stars. Instead, it looked like an abandoned Jedi hovel from the Purge. Kylo could tell he was not the only one to get a strange, sick sort of satisfaction from this.

Hux knelt to Snoke now, under his scrutinising eyes, but soon, soon they would have this room to themselves, to be repurposed for strictly their use.

"The map," Snoke said. Kylo was aware the rumble of his voice came from some built-in modulator, to make him appear more threatening. But everything in this galaxy could die. He knew that intimately. "I trust you have news on its location."

Hux looked up, eyes brimming with a carefully masked hatred only Kylo could sense. "Signs point to a village in Jakku, My Lord."

All of Hux's anger, his indignance, his ambition, it fueled the Dark in them both. It was the wood on which their fire burnt. It was how they would take from Snoke's very hands the hardest thing he fought for.

"A village in Jakku?" Snoke hummed. "Go there. Tell me what you find. Take no prisoners, only the information we need."

Hux dipped his head. "As you request."

Snoke had no reason to suspect them. Rather, he ought to be pleased with their performance. They had gotten him the map's location in less time than estimated, thanks to Grandfather's unsubtle hints. They had raised no concerns, no snappy questions, only a sense of frustrating normalcy.

They both itched to find action.

And yet there was none.

Jakku was a boring planet, and its villages would match, filled to the brim with boring people. People who ignored antique relics like their map, who focused on scavenging useless scrap from long-downed ships. He did not look forward to breathing its air.

As Snoke's image winked out, Hux let his face curl back into its usual insubordinate sneer. From the Link, he could sense a sort of strange amusement settle in, perhaps as Hux realised just who he'd pledged himself to all these years. Snoke was not incompetent, to his credit, but the more he looked, the more Kylo could find fault. Snoke was vague, he punished with no explanation, he held himself with a kind of superiority that made Kylo reconsider his own. The effect was nauseating.

"At least yours has some merit," Hux chimed in, sprawling back casually on one of the shrine's flatter and more welcoming crystals. It glittered beneath him, as if recognising a fellow being in the Force.

"What of mine has merit?" Kylo blinked. Then, he remembered the Bond. He remembered he hadn't much subconscious shielding, and that Hux was privy to every thought he didn't actively block. "Oh, my... grandstanding."

"I see my accusations didn't fly over your head."

"I don't simply hear," Kylo snapped. "I listen."

"Really?" Hux asked. "I've yet to see any evidence of that. My consoles are still replaced weekly."

"I'll work to control my anger."

"I don't mind," Hux said, "if you use that kind of brutality on our enemies. But the consoles are on our side, Ren, if you haven't noticed. No matter how unresponsive. Though, I'm beginning to consider that might be a side effect of your constant roughhousing."

"I'm frustrated by our useless crewmembers. This is surely a feeling you would relate to?"

"You don't see me throwing them about like ragdolls." Hux waved a gloved hand. "It doesn't matter. We won't be on the Finalizer these next few days regardless. We have a map to find, yes?"

"It will be guarded, by Jedi. By the Resistance."

"Is that not a given?" Hux stretched, cracked the joints in his neck. "I'm really rather looking forward to it, actually. Seeing the same hallways over and over, each and every cycle, it doesn't help one's sanity."

"You're looking forward to the fresh air," Kylo said, blankly.

"I'm looking forward to exercising my new power. As often as possible."

Sometimes Hux's lust for murder disturbed even him. As admirable the general's spirit was, it was also terrifying.

Hux titled his head. "Yours matches mine. I haven't demonstrated anything you aren't similarly capable of, so you needn't be jealous."

"It's not jealousy." _It's begrudging respect._

Hux laughed lightly. It sounded entirely devoid of humour. _The feeling is mutual._

* * *

The ride to Jakku was surprisingly pleasant, given the circumstances. Hux brought with him a bottle of Corellian brandy and actually bothered to strike up some form of conversation. Kylo wondered if he'd been replaced with a new man, but the incredulous arch of Hux's brow in response told him quickly otherwise.

"I'm only trying to make this go faster for us," Hux said. "Nobody likes waiting."

Especially not Skywalkers, or Solos, and definitely not Skywalker-Solos. Kylo often felt like scratching out his own mind when he was left to do nothing. It was unproductive, it was useless, it was always underusing his talents, which could easily be put to use elsewhere, to further their goals. But starflight wasn't a choice. Snoke hadn't ordered him to wait, and yet waiting had come along with the ride as if it belonged.

"It is appreciated."

"Yes, well, we wouldn't want you going mad, now, would we?" Hux laughed, took another sip of his brandy. He looked so at home like this, poised like a diplomat with eyes like a predator. Kylo only ever looked at others like prey, never like they were of any great importance. They were all pawns in the game. "Not than you can sink much farther."

Kylo wrinkled his nose. "So you've said."

He wasn't insane, he was simply ahead. Ambitious. Willing to cross boundaries barely any being would dare get anywhere near. He was ruthless, but he was of perfectly sound mind, as much as Hux liked to insist otherwise. He calculated his every movement, planned down his every strategy, as Grandfather would've at the height of the Empire's reign. He was to emulate the best and so he had to _be_ the best.

It was clear Hux thought the same of his own duties to the First Order. The man was driven like no other, and was, of course, never shy in admitting it. It could be irksome, but it was also a reassurance. Their reconnaissance mission had a higher chance of success with Hux at their side, and they all knew it.

"I'm flattered," said Hux.

Kylo stared. "It's the truth."

He was never fond of concealing the truth. Navigating life with success had always called for blunt, uncaring realism. Anyone too weak to face that would never succeed. Not without a miracle.

But Hux didn't press. He knew how to pick his battles. He knew strategy, and timing, and patience, and this would win them their knowledge, their training. They were as his lightsaber: Kylo was the blade and Hux was the hilt.

This was something important to all of them, their cohesion, their successful Bond. It meant winning or losing, but more than that, it meant Kylo was not always the single puzzle piece that refused to fit together with the rest of the board, if he chose not to be. He could find synchronicity, and demonstrate it.

And Hux had it, too, by carefully-formulated consequence.

This was why they would win.

* * *

Their entourage ship flew onwards. Jakku would soon be in the horizon, like a burning sun. The last time Kylo had visited, the upper atmosphere had been smoky, and its orbiting space filled with debris. He wondered what little lifespans the planet's native inhabitants had. How could they eat, drink, breathe, survive? Did the caves that sheltered them from duststorms ever collapse in on their own heads? The entire framework was built on shaky foundations. So easily could it topple that Kylo, for a split second, debated ignoring the map completely.

"You hate Jakku that much?" Hux asked.

"Skywalkers never did like sand," came Grandfather's voice. Kylo didn't startle, but he winced slightly at the sudden imposing presence in the Force.

"No, we don't," Kylo agreed. "Hello, Grandfather."

"I'm here to supervise your descent, and make sure you infiltrate the village with subtlety. You will not be mindlessly slaughtering every innocent that comes your way, do you understand?"

"Yes, Grandfather."

"The Resistance fighters stationed here are some of my daughter's best. I will not have her work ruined for such easily avoidable reasons."

Kylo dipped his head. "Of course. Mother never did like having her efforts undone."

Grandfather settled in the seat next to him, and floated a glass up to his outstretched hand. To Kylo's surprise, he drank from it with ease. "It takes many years of Force training to be so synchronised upon one's death," he commented, lightly. "I have faith both of you, too, will achieve it one day."

Kylo hoped he could rise to that level of skill. It had been his dream since his beginning, and yet there were days where he grew increasingly unsure of his ability. Could he surpass his ancestry? Could he even hope to equal them? He would admit it to no-one, but he wondered, often.

"You honour us," said Kylo, instead.

"It is the truth." Grandfather hummed. "You have potential. I would not have come to you if you did not. I would not care if you were wasting your future if it were not so bright. I would not have brought you and Hux together if I did not see great power in your unity."

Hux blinked, pleased and flattered, broadcasting clear for all to see, and replied, "I appreciate the opportunity."

* * *

Jakku's atmosphere hadn't changed at all. Still, the debris in orbit made it hard to navigate, and still, the clouds were full of dust and dirt and sand. The sun had set, leaving darkness in its wake, and yet the heat had only began its hungry path through their hull and into their engines. The entire planet was a solid, singular colour, save for the small spots of civilisation sprinkled here and there.

It was absolutely deplorable. He hadn't the mind to stay here any longer than was absolutely necessary. The sooner he left, the sooner he followed the map's true quest, the closer he'd find himself to proper enlightenment. Staying on this junkheap was a waste of every breath he took.

They flew until they hit the eye of the hurricane of shadows, until the harsh glare reflected on the ship's paint faded into nothing. There, they landed, gentle and quiet, behind a dune about ten kilometres from the village - an easy trek, compared to the usual regimen. Even so close, Kylo could've easily mistaken the entire region for some uninhabited, inhospitable mess. He could sense barely any life within a radius of a few kilometres. Only a small spot of sentience here and there, dotted between the grains like little saplings.

They said nothing to each other, only walked slowly northward. A scattering of Stormtroopers surrounded them, which their superiors had demanded, for "extra protection." Of course, they were only a burden on his and Hux's journey. A hinderance. They were perfectly capable of fending for themselves. He could rip them all to pieces at any given moment if he so chose.

He simply did not.

The 'Troopers shook like the wind. He could practically taste their fear, the stench of terror sticking to the back of his throat and under his tongue.

He ignored it and kept walking. Silent.

* * *

They reached the edge of the village, and only there did Kylo tell the 'Troopers to stop. He didn't need their cowardice interfering with his operation. Fear made people clumsy, and a twitchy finger on a blaster trigger would ruin any and every chance of finding the map. If he harmed this hovel in any way, he knew Grandfather would refuse to train him. And Mother... would only be driven more fiercely to protect those few, precious bits of data.

He and Hux continued on alone, blending into the darkness as they'd been taught. Soft light bled from each house on the settlement, but Kylo knew the one without the raucous laughter, or the smell of dinner, or the crying of children, that house would contain the map. Only the most unassuming.

"To your left," Kylo said, barely above a whisper. Hux leant in to hear. "The house to your left. It's too quiet."

Hux nodded, set careful pace towards the window, and ever-so-gently, looked in. Immediately, he ducked down beneath the windowsill, and gave a nod. "There are two men inside. One wears the Resistance insignia."

"One of Mother's," Kylo said.

"How do you plan to do this?"

Kylo reached for the clasps at his neck, and undid the bindings of his helmet. There, he set it flat in the sand. "How my uncle would've liked. We talk."

" _You,_ trying diplomacy? Have I gone mad?"

Kylo stared at the flickering, warm glow seeping from the tiny little windows peppered across the Resistance hut. He heard voices, hushed, and felt the presence of a trained Force-sensitive. A Jedi. How they had not yet perished was beyond him. "Perhaps I am the one who has gone mad, General."

Hux narrowed his eyes. "That happened long ago." A sigh. "Do you really want to do this peacefully? It would be so much easier to take the information from them forcefully, you know."

"That method would anger Grandfather. We cannot take that risk."

Hux snorted. "I haven't done 'peace' in years."

"Nor have I. At least this serves as good practice."

And with that, he rose, and knocked slowly on the door.

* * *

 **Author's Note:** I WASN'T REALLY ANY FASTER, WAS I? I'm trash. I'm sorry, I'm such trash. Blame all the gaming. It's not that I'm lazy af or anything. No, it's just that I'm totally distracted by... lore analysis! And raids with low (agonising) droprates!

(And, as always, thanks to my darling Shaky for her consistent work as Beta! xx)


	7. Downed

There was chaos from inside. Roiling emotions, panicked yelling, scuffling, the sound of bottles falling. He waited for a few seconds before the house settled into dead silence. Only at this point did he knock again, with more insistence.

There was a pause, and then, "We're busy. Come back later."

It could never work and they all knew it. "I want only to talk."

"Yeah, y'know, I kinda highly doubt that, buddy."

He could taste impatience on the back of his tongue. He lurched forward, but Hux grabbed his shoulder within a millisecond, and shushed him. "Have a civil conversation with us and we promise not to slaughter your entire settlement."

"I doubt that, too," came the voice.

Pleasantly, Hux asked, "Would you like me to sign this promise in blood?"

"You go too far."

Hux waved him off. "Relax, only a very little blood. A minimal amount will make no difference."

"You would let the Resistance have a sample of your own-"

Hux huffed. "Diplomacy was your idea."

More shuffling from inside. Mumbling voices, hushed. Harsh tones, a desperate sense of hope. Kylo could read them like books. "'Diplomacy?' Did I just hear something about diplomacy?"

"We are offering." Kylo shifted his stance. There might be a chance. He hadn't the experience to know when to give up, besides. He would stand outside this door all night if he had to.

 _You will not,_ Hux snapped, sour. _Or at least, I don't plan to._

 _We are getting somewhere. Look. They're considering us._

 _I was the one to offer up my own lifeblood._

Kylo scoffed, but was interrupted by the sad, hacking cough of the ancient Jedi inside. His companion reeked of concern. "Offering what?"

 _We've already won,_ Kylo thought, simply. Hux smiled.

 _We'll see to that yet._

* * *

He didn't synchronise with patience. Generally, he avoided it. Waiting got him nowhere. Standing around would only give the enemy precious time to prepare. But negotiations, on their knees and begging for a copy of the map data, that required an ungainly amount of calm. How could he be collected? He was so close, and yet he was so _far._

The Resistance fighter in front of them, Dameron, he possessed the droid that was the key to everything. He guarded it as if it were family. In a way, it was. Every move Kylo made, every impatient huff, Dameron twitched, fingers gently brushing over the barrel of his blaster. In turn, Hux would bristle, another bead of sweat would drip down his forehead in sheer concentration. Grandfather had tried to show him how to slow blasterbolts. Not stop them, that was not yet within his skill level, but to slow them. Hux clearly wanted to ignore that boundary completely.

Neither of them were helping. The restlessness of one fed into the frustration of the other, like a snake eating its own tail, a horrible emotional feedback loop within their Link.

Their little entourage were beginning to broadcast little seeds of aggravation, blooming here and there, as every diplomatic step was met by another misstep. They were silent, but Kylo could've reached out and grasped their urge to speak in his own two hands.

The droid chittered nervously. "So, let me get this straight," Dameron began, for the third time. He reached to scratch the BB-8 unit fondly on the head. "You want a copy of the data Beebee has here? Just a copy?"

Kylo ground his teeth. "Why would I need the original?"

"Don't you suspect I might somehow falsify the copy?" Dameron was met only by Kylo's impatient stare. "Not even a little bit?"

"I would know."

"I'm sure we all have places to be," said Hux. "Is it a deal? You only need to give a yes or no answer. No paperwork."

Dameron hesitated. "Yeah. Come back in a day and I'll have a copy for you."

"A day!" Hux's knuckles went white. "Do you know how exposed we are staying on this planet, Poe Dameron?"

"I have to make sure the transfer is secure," Dameron said, slowly, as if Hux were a particularly stupid bantha and not one of the First Order's highest ranked.

Kylo growled. "Speak to him like that again-"

The Jedi beside them scrabbled at his neck. Hux blinked. "Just what do you think you're-"

"-and you'll soon regret testing our patience any further."

Dameron shot forward. "Quit that or you won't get the data at all, you second-rate, walking Imp _scare tactic._ "

Hux sighed, pinched the bridge of his nose. "I think we need a moment. We'll reconvene in the morning, and you will have the data for us, correct?"

"Yeah, that's right."

There was one 'Trooper in their entourage, staring with such focus at the choking, blue-faced Jedi. Kylo abruptly felt something was wrong, but he couldn't place it. "Then we're leaving." Before things went against Grandfather's wishes. He beckoned their guard. "With me, now."

"Nice chat. No, really, it was honestly a pleasure doing business with you," Hux said, around a passably false smile, and strolled fluidly out the door.

* * *

"What were you thinking?"

"I don't have the time for this," Kylo said. Hux huffed.

"What difference will a few hours make?"

"The difference between life and death."

Hux's eyes narrowed. "Don't be ridiculous."

Kylo sat in the sand outside his temporary camp and felt it seep over his robes. His face pinched in disgust. It wasn't ridiculous to be wary of this planet. There was something wrong with it, deeply wrong. He couldn't place it, the cause of this strange foreboding, but he had learnt long ago to trust his instincts. He wouldn't falter now.

"You sense something?" Hux echoed. He sat comfortably in the sand, looking strangely serene. The torchlight lit the floor beneath him to match the burnt, fiery tones of his hair. He looked like he belonged. "'Belong?' I'm merely adaptable," Hux corrected. "Now, what in the stars did you sense? I get nothing but fear from these people."

"Protectiveness."

Hux looked up blankly. "There are mothers and fathers desperately huddled with their children in every corner of every house in this village, Ren, honestly."

"No, protectiveness from one of _ours._ "

Now Hux looked offended, and a bit concerned. "One of my 'Troopers is displaying an- an- _unnecessary emotional response?_ " No, not just concern. Anger, disappointment. "I trained them better than that," he spat. "Far better."

"Pupils often disobey their masters," said Kylo.

" _Not me!_ " Hux sighed. "Alright, apparently I fall prey to this... issue, as well. One of the 'Troopers is feeling sorry for the villagers, is that it?"

"He feels a connection with them. I can see it. He reaches out for them. He doesn't know them, but he cares for them. He's scared for them. He'd go against the Order if it meant saving them, actually." Kylo paused. "It is odd, how he acts. He aspires to be like the Resistance fighter we just negotiated with." He grabbed more tightly at the 'Trooper's mind, a mess of shapes and colours and vivid memories. This one had passion. His head was less hollow than the others, his thoughts less forcibly structured. It intrigued him. "He wants to 'be there' for his friends. Oh. He wants to _have_ friends. Not just... birthmates."

Hux wrinkled his nose. "He's breaking through his conditioning. And you're _fascinated?_ " He shook his head abruptly. "Nevermind. Of course you're fascinated by him. I suppose I should be too, but aren't you the least bit concerned? This could happen to all our officers."

"We're restructuring the Order regardless. Perhaps this is fortuitous."

Hux pursed his lips. "I highly doubt it."

"Consider it," Kylo said. "An army with a mind."

"This is not mindfulness!" Hux threw a hand down on the sand. "These are the sad notions of some desperate man whose goal in life is to scavenge any possible self-congratulatory mission he can find."

Kylo blinked. "Should we kill him?"

Hux faltered, then, picked up his hand and shook off the grains spotting his gloves. "Normally, I would have traitors publicly executed. But this is not a public venue, is it? And this is no ordinary traitor."

"If we let him escape, track his movements, will he not lead us to a Resistance base? Won't he go to my mother, my father, my uncle for backup with that fighterpilot of his?"

"That's positively crafty for your blunt methods, Ren."

Kylo bowed his head. "It would please him."

A small wisp of ice, a small shard lodged itself into his mind, and he felt a pressure on his chest, a gentle crushing. "Indeed it would."

He whipped around. "Grandfather. Do you find our actions sufficiently... satisfactory?"

"You surprise me."

Kylo did not know what this meant. Were they erratic, unpredictable? Or were they gifted with the appropriate ingenuity?

Grandfather hummed to himself. "It was uncharacteristic of me to underestimate my own blood. We commit with all or with nothing."

Hux narrowed his eyes, face curling into curiosity. "Now, is that your blessing or your curse?"

"Both. Skywalkers know nothing better than duality, Brendol Hux. It would be best if you remembered that."

"For my interest or for your own? Should I be wary of this knowledge or use it to my advantage?"

Vader's laugh was a short, booming bark. His eyes lit with a strange sort of fervour, and his mouth twitched with the beginnings of something that Kylo knew, from the mirror he looked into every day, would soon transform into a greedy, contemplative smirk. "Both," he said, and began to fade and whirl like the sand that blew around them. "Continue as you were. This is the correct course of action, and I am interested to see where this path will lead you in time."

Then he was gone.

"Well," said Hux. "Your egos match, that I can ascertain with ease."

Kylo shot him a sour look. It was returned with something sickly sweet.

* * *

He'd shot a tracker on their little droid that night, and he'd had his suspicions, and sure enough, the morning was a barren wasteland. Yet somehow he was still surprised they'd mustered up the courage to attempt such a thing.

"Well I never," Hux said, exceedingly dry. "What a complete shock to the system."

The X-Wing was gone from its dock, the droid charting a course as far away from their current location as physically possible, and the villagers nowhere to be found. They were also short one particular Stormtrooper. Kylo could not summon disappointment within himself. Truthfully, he was excited. His blood was pounding. Like a nexu giving chase to its prey, he would hunt them down and retrieve the necessary intel.

Hux stretched, the cords in his neck flexing against the thick, dripping beams of sunlight that shone down from the stars above. Kylo was suffocating in the heat. Hux's calm was befitting for a Jedi. "It's true," he said. "We don't have much time to lose. But 'giving chase' so soon will surely spook them, and we can't have that. So I'm giving them a small headstart. Call it good form."

"You want to stay here?"

"Not very much, no. I'd like to travel to the neighbouring town and restock our supplies, and then and only then, follow the droid's trail."

"Fine. But we can't leave it too late."

"It would be all too easy to lose their signal, I know."

"We should pack immediately," Kylo began, but Hux waved him off.

"Already done." At Kylo's confused glance, he elaborated, "I don't sleep much." And left it at that.

"Then what do you suggest?"

Hux gave a sly smile. "We plan."

* * *

There was an extensive holomap already shining onward inside the camp. It lit the darkness around them in beautiful webs of light. It reminded him of his time as a child in Uncle Luke's Temple, looking up at the stars. He hadn't looked at them since the massacre.

"It's outdated," Hux said, distracted. His hands shuffled through their bag of rations, until he picked out a protein bar with a faded wrapper, so industrially processed it looked beyond unappetising. Hux ate it as if it were the very essence of life, and continued to absently point at the small pinpricks that marked towns and villages. "But not much changes here, does it? So it isn't of any particular consequence, as long as we get a general idea."

"And if we end up lost?"

"It isn't hard to find our way again. We've come prepared."

"For how long?" It was true they had the First Order's backup on this expedition, but Kylo was wondering just how long that would last. Once their intent to change the very base structure of the organisation was announced, they'd be down a few thousand men. More than a few thousand men.

"You're correct, but that's an issue to address later. Currently? Long enough."

* * *

Kylo had trained to withstand physical exertion, of course, but the thick, smothering heat of his robes was unhelpful on their journey to the next town. Hux had folded his coat over his shoulder, but Kylo had no such removable object to speak of. His hood freed his hair, but he was still sweating, he was still damp. Hux could remove his hat, his coat, his inner jacket, and leave himself in only basic training clothes. He had luck on his side, as ever.

He had reached the peak of the highest dune, overlooking the small outpost below. Hardly any lights shone, leaving only the sound of scrap metal jangling in the wind. A scavenger's blessing and their curse. It reeked of empty despair, sickly and clinging like droplets of water. The feeling was overwhelming, as if he, too, would become infused with the hopelessness of poverty, of living in the remnants of downed Imperial Star Destroyers.

The ships were too good for them. Such an incredible waste.

Hux skated down the sand gracefully, shielded from the sand by a small Force barrier. It was impressive for someone with so little expertise in the field.

"You should expect that I take to it quickly, Ren."

"Don't push yourself too far beyond your limits. You'll wear yourself out before the enemy, and I _won't_ drag your carcass from this place."

"The enemy, in this case, being a sad little droid and his two rogue would-be rebels. I feel entirely too threatened."

"They've settled a few kilometres from the town. They could attempt an ambush."

"The map says they're quite near some sort of structure, not naturally forming. I imagine some entirely too sympathetic stranger has offered to house them for the night. At least on their grounds. They're certainly close enough to be noticed."

"It's possible they were shot."

"The droid strays off every so often. In a place like this? It would've been sold or dismantled for credits long ago. They're still alive."

"Should we kill the person giving them refuge?"

Hux hummed. "No, why don't we keep them alive, hmm? They could be another useful Resistance member."

"I sense the host will not welcome us."

"They do seem immovable. It's only very faint for me, of course, but to think such a superficial impression would leave this sort of impact... we'll be careful or we'll die, do you understand? No running in to show off your blasterbolt-deflecting dramatics."

"...As you wish."

"This is not only in my interest, you realise. Unless you _do_ in fact want to die, and in that case, yes, this is entirely selfish. I do have need for your dramatics. On occasion. And stringing your corpse up and attempting to animate life will not fool the opponent."

What a comforting thought. _An impersonal reason to require a person remain under your protection, General. I'm... moved._

 _You ought to be. I have done this for no-one else. They haven't shown any signs of deserving it._

 _And I have?_

 _You chose to tell me about this path through the Force. You chose to enlighten me. For that, I owe you a debt._

 _I only demand recompense from my adversaries. You have no need to owe me._

 _How singularly limiting, Ren. You should think bigger._

He could hear a remnant of his father echoing in his head. A small voice that said, _"Yeah? Well, then_ you _should think smaller."_

Hux began to laugh. _I knew there was a reason your father riled up half of this galaxy. I'd had yet to experience it until now. The Solo brand of backtalk. How incredibly entertaining._

Kylo snarled at him. _Do not pry where you are not wanted, General._

Hux only chuckled. "Do you bite?" he asked, and walked off, towards the great downed ship that lay without peace in the distance.

Kylo sometimes felt he hated him.

* * *

 **Author's Note:** I am stupidly late and this is because I've been playing video games. I have no excuses, as usual, and I won't make any up. I'm still flithy gamer trash, don't you worry. Hopefully me actually moving the plot along to the events of the movie will make up for it?

Enjoy. And thank you, as ever, for putting up with the wait xox.


	8. Chased

As they got closer to the ship, the Force warning became even more obvious. Like a sign painted in glaring red, screaming as loud as it could, _"GET OUT. TRESSPASSERS WILL BE SHOT."_

It was clear from the deep marks scored into the sand than many a ship part had been dragged here. The Force user was a junker, he knew, but evidently a dedicated one. Perhaps that contributed to the need for private property. Some of him wondered if he'd find a tower, fortified with the ripped-off pieces of ancient starcruiser hulls, standing high and proud in the horizon, lined with reconditioned lasercannons.

"That's a lovely fantasy," Hux said, dryly, "but we'll likely find one incredibly irritable and frustratingly evasive lowlife skirting the very edges of legality. A Star Destroyer Castle would greatly surprise me."

Kylo frowned. "That's-"

"Not for certain, I know. No need to lower your hopes though, Lord Ren. They'll doubtlessly put up a good fight."

Battle was not _all_ he lived for. He had use for other things, for training, for meditation, for rest, for nourishment. But Kylo knew Hux didn't care to know any of this.

The soft breeze pushed hair gently over his eyes, brushed sand against his cheeks. But he saw it nevertheless, a small structure in the distance, glowing with the light of life. With every farther footstep, it grew larger and larger in his vision, a great beast downed on the sand. He blinked.

"Is that-?" Hux squinted. "Is that an AT-AT?"

"It is."

What crazed being would live in a fallen AT-AT? He was floored, but impressed. It took dedication to defend such a crumbling fortress, after so many years since the Empire's defeat. The AT-AT models had always been strong, impenetrable, but time wore down all things. Even Imperial engineering at its top height.

Once they arrived at the base's feet, quite literally, Kylo stood and contemplated knocking on the hull. This fortress owner - this private, secretive scavenger - was already aware of their location, but perhaps they could recognise a sign of peace. He knelt, momentarily, and then whirled backwards as a hydrospanner was hurled swiftly towards his eye.

"Leave this place! Right now! I won't warn you again!" came a booming voice. Kylo felt it was familiar somehow, lilting in some odd way he'd heard before. But he hadn't the time to consider.

"I will not harm you," he told the empty air. "I wish to talk."

"No, you won't harm me," said the stranger. Then, she tripped him with the blunt end of a staff. He tumbled into the sand, Hux soon following, in between his hysterical laughter.

"Karking hell, she's even worse than I expected."

"What are you doing here? The town is that way." She pointed an angry finger back in the direction they had come. "This land belongs to _me._ "

"We know you're harbouring fugitives," Hux said lightly. "They promised us-" he coughed "-a copy of some very, very useful data."

"So I've heard," she said. "And frankly, I don't care. You're from the First Order, aren't you?"

"We're looking to overthrow the current leadership," Kylo said. "We don't plan on killing any of your refugees."

She threw up her hands. "They're not my refugees! I just won't stand for any more of these scare tactics from your band of-" Kylo watched as she searched for a word, desperate. "Your band of totalitarian, overdramatic, barbaric _pawns!_ " This insult seemed to please her, and she huffed, satisfied.

From the corner, behind the Walker's head, someone crawled out, smudged with dirt and sand and oil, one leg held firmly in someone else's grasp - the fighterpilot's. "Don't hurt her! Please, take me, but don't hurt her! She has nothing to do with this."

Hux snorted, and rolled onto his back, looking up at the stars. Blood trickled from his nose. "She does now."

As the traitor Stormtrooper moved forward, he dragged the fighterpilot along with him, until they both stood at the Walker's nose. "Don't take either of them," Dameron said. "I'm the one you want."

"You won't be taking any of them," said the fortress-keeper.

Hux sighed. "You-" He motioned vaguely at the staff's direction. The woman looked down. "The person crazy enough to settle in a fallen AT-AT. What's your name?"

"You have no right to ask, and I won't tell you," she replied.

"I think I can help you. We're not planning anything. In fact, take my blaster." Hux held it up. "No, here, have it. You want a gesture of trust, don't you?"

The blaster was snatched quickly from his hands. "My name is Rey."

Kylo's curiosity begged for more. "And your surname?"

"Surname?" Rey seemed genuinely stumped by this question, an old pain rising in her eyes. Kylo felt it like a knife in his side. "My family left. I won't know it until they return."

Kylo frowned. _They won't be returning._

"That's very helpful," Hux grit out, but Kylo only stared in Rey's direction, watching in fascination as her face curled into a snarl.

"You don't get to say that. That's ridiculous. You don't know anything about me."

"I know you heard that," Kylo said. "You have the Force."

Hux sneezed against the sand. _You're being a true diplomat._

 _Watch._

"I- I, what?"

 _Learn, General. Trust your instincts, and trust in me. This will work._

* * *

Rey staggered back. "You know of the Force? Some soldier? _You?_ "

"I am no soldier."

She looked dubious, wind blowing sweat-damp hair over narrowed eyes. She took a step back, as if to size them up. Dameron and the Stormtrooper stared incredulously.

The 'Trooper made a wounded noise. "You can't seriously be considering-"

Kylo felt something about these three rebels and their little droid was very important. They appeared so insignificant, so small, so defenceless, and yet they held the key to a wealth of knowledge in this galaxy. They had found it, sought it out, taken what wasn't theirs to take. Dameron had made a name for himself. The 'Trooper was the first to defect. And Rey, whomever she was destined to be, Kylo could sense her almost immeasurable strength.

She could be their greatest asset or their greatest enemy. Kylo only had to say a few words.

"The Force is yours."

* * *

Hesitantly, Rey had allowed them entrance to her makeshift shelter, only if they promised to 'behave.' She had led them in with her staff to their throats and sat them down at something approaching a table, then asked where outside the Order she could find lessons in the Force.

Kylo now sat, blankly staring at Rey's measly rations, wondering who in this galaxy had the nerve, the _daring_ to stand up to Darth Vader's successor.

Perhaps the next in line.

"The map your guests possess," Hux said, smoothly, "is the answer to that. It leads to Luke Skywalker."

Rey stopped eating. "The greatest Jedi Master to live?" She swiveled around to face Dameron and the defector. "You didn't tell me this!"

Dameron shrugged. "Hey, give it a little rest, at least. I didn't know you knew!"

"And I'm betting you don't exactly throw that information around for everyone to find, do you, Dameron?"

"Call me Poe," he said. "Not you, First Order drones. Him, and Rey." Dameron blinked, then frowned. "Do you have a name?"

"FN-2187."

"Oh, part of Phasma's personal designation," said Hux. "You could be one of the best."

"No thanks, I'll pass. I'm good. Pretty good for the next lifetime, actually."

"That's a lot to swallow. How about... Finn? That work?"

Kylo fought to keep the table from crushing under the weight of his frustration. He was not here to watch future Resistance members give names to themselves, dripping their sweet mush of hope and love all over the workspace. They were here to fulfill their duty. To retrieve the map, to leave this forsaken planet, and to return to Grandfather's guidance.

"We don't have time."

"I'd almost forgotten how impatient he is," Hux said, conversationally. "Rey, Finn, Dameron, do we have a deal or do we not? An answer - a clear answer - would be greatly appreciated."

"I'm coming with you," Dameron said. "Finn, Rey, you don't have to. I know people who can help you get out, Finn. And Rey, well. Keep living your, uh. This."

"If you're going, I'm going. You guys are what I've wished I could be my whole life. If I can get a chance to change that, I'm not gonna say no. No way I am."

"The two of us are coming, then. I need to know you won't misuse that data."

"We can smuggle you onboard if you pretend to be our prisoners," said Hux. "Though Ren will have to make a great show of 'torturing' you for information. You're very good at that sort of thing regardless, aren't you, Ren?"

"Do not test me, General."

"I'd like to learn the ways of the Force," said Rey. "But my family are coming back for me. Leaving them here alone is the last thing I plan on doing. Are there truly no teachers on this planet?"

"None as good as Luke Skywalker," said Kylo. Then, stupidly, "He taught me."

Mentally, Hux reeled. _You're acknowledging this? That you're not simply a Knight of Ren?_

 _Luke Skywalker is Anakin Skywalker's son,_ Kylo insisted.

This convinced no-one. Hux was projecting only disbelief, but Kylo could sense the strange way Hux analysed those he found himself curious about. A sort of prickling, cool sensation from his scalp to the tips of his toes. The great, omniscient, instinctual feeling of being watched.

He liked it when it was directed at those other than himself. Their enemies cowered under his gaze; Kylo wanted to squirm away. It was uncomfortable, to be so _known._

Hux dropped it. _As you say._

"He taught a member of the First Order?" Rey seemed as if she had been physically struck. "He taught _you?_ "

"He is my family. And he had no knowledge of my loyalty's true extent."

Rey slammed hands down on the table, rattling it beneath them. Some of her food spilled over her plate, but she didn't seem to care in any way, no matter how small. "Until you betrayed him!"

"Why should you care?" Kylo asked. He was aware it sounded petulant, but the point stood. Who was she to pass judgements on the inner workings of his family? She had no place with them until she earnt it, and a display of power and blind courage had not yet gotten her that far.

"Why should I care-? Why-!" Rey spluttered. "The Jedi are heroes to me. They've always been, ever since I was very little."

Kylo shrugged this off. "We all have faults."

A sharp reminder, prodding at the back of his head. _Diplomacy, Ren._

 _I don't have enough time for this kind of standoff. We have to leave as soon as possible. Snoke will ask questions._

"Ignore our friend here," said Hux, eye twitching, vein pulsing in his forehead. "He's always... itching for a fight, shall we say."

Rey sat back, then, and was very quiet for an uncomfortably long moment. Kylo had counted five times the wind had shook the house so violently the dishes on the table began to rumble and roar. Rey was scratching marks into its surface with her nails. Finally, she said, "Will training in the Force allow me to find my family? Anywhere? If I leave Jakku, will I be able to see them again?"

"Even if your family no longer lives you will find them," Kylo said, and impatience clipped obviously at his words. Rey's disposition soured further.

"Can you promise that? Can you promise me I'll be able to find them on my own?"

"You can figure out yourself whether I'm lying."

Rey sighed, long and put upon, pinching at the bridge of her nose. "How long would I have to train before I could find them?"

"Theoretically," Kylo began, and thought to Grandfather, his strange awareness of every breath every member of his bloodline took, his uncanny ability to know exactly when, where, and how things were done, had he been there to witness them or not, "not a long time. It will require dedication."

"I can give you dedication."

"We will teach you to broaden your senses, and to contact the spirits that know this galaxy down to every grain of sand. And once you've found your kin, you are welcome to return. Encouraged to return. Your potential is... immense. Long-reaching."

Hux laughed. "Eloquent. You have the power to do anything, Rey, whether it be to live out the rest of your life in this empty tin while you wait for your family to return, or to simply save yourself a few decades of misery and seek them out yourself."

"You want me to work with you. In the Order. You're offering me a job."

"Yes," said Kylo. "I need competent people if I want to survive the overhaul."

"You said you were trying to reform. How, exactly?"

"I can't say I enjoy diplomacy, and I'll be honest with you, I do love the feeling of control, overlooking the vast expanse of our empire, finding order in chaos. But the Resistance proves the First Order's tactics aren't going to be met by smiles and nodding heads. The Republic is frustratingly determined to remain. Clearly, we need to align ourselves." Hux breathed. "I want to run things, Rey. Frankly, I'd like to run everything. To do that, the Order needs to fit the Republic's standards. And so I'm attempting to refine it to those standards."

"And you wouldn't mind the boost in physical power as well, is that it?" Rey sneered.

"Physical power and mental power are key to running the regime the Supreme Leader currently clings to like a shaking child. I want strength, I want knowledge, and where better to find these two things in perfect harmony than the Force, hmm?"

"I won't let you rule our entire galaxy!"

"Then come with us," Hux replied, with a casual shrug that only fueled the fire in Rey's temperament.

"Fine," she spat, then quieted. She looked down emptily at the husk of her home, and said, "Let me leave them a note. To know I haven't abandoned them."

Finn rested a hand on her shoulder. "Nobody thinks that."

A sad smile. "Maybe not yet."

* * *

 **Author's Note:** I'm still a late ho. I accidentally two other WIPs. So now that's four. But there's not as much filler, so that's a plus, right? /nervous laughter trails off into the distance


	9. Home

Rey packed precious few things when she left. The hull was a hollow shell from the beginning, but now it truly reflected its age, the long past glory days of the Empire lying bare and fraying for all to see.

It was gorgeous. The tech was still elegant, the marred controls still usable, the death that hung around it a pristinely crafted warning.

Kylo wanted it for his collection. When Rey returned, he would have to buy it from her. She would realise her family was dead soon enough, Kylo was sure. And then she'd finally leave this hell, finally let snap the single tether binding her to its heart.

He hoped. In truth, he had no frame of reference. He had left his family voluntarily, and yet Rey had stayed here for years waiting for hers to return. It made no sense, that level of dedication. His family didn't miss him now; he doubted Rey's would mind much if she left, for once in her small life. It was a fitting punishment for those who would abandon their child on a free-for-all deathtrap like this, besides. If his family had left him so, they wouldn't deserve his loyalty for a second, let alone decades.

This planet was desolate and dry and the worst environment for a child Kylo could possibly imagine. Why in the thousand stars did Rey even give the slightest care to her bloodline's wellbeing?

Unless she knew something he didn't, which was very much unlikely. He wouldn't call his judgement into question for such trivial reasons. She knew as little of them as he did.

"Where are we going?" Rey asked. She hauled medical supplies behind her, the fifth-portion they'd split for her. Between them, the carry was manageable, but Kylo could still sense frustration and impatience from all of the party.

"To our ship," Hux said. "Quite a few kilometres away, at this point. Just outside the village Dameron was hiding in."

"I wasn't hiding."

"You were a stowaway," Kylo said, and blinked back sweat from his eyes. He'd returned the mask to its usual place in hiding his face, but still he wasn't freed from the heat. Only Rey showed no signs of struggle, though Dameron and Finn were far from complaint. They'd been trained for this.

"I was protecting that map."

Finn shrugged. "I'd say that was fair enough to assume. We usually do a lot more shooting, and brutal, gory murder."

Dameron grinned. "Finally someone with some sense."

"I'm sorry, was it not common knowledge that the First Order leaves a string of death in its wake?" asked Rey, sharply.

"It was, to all the very few survivors," Kylo replied, with all the calm disconnect he could summon, and walked on.

Hux gave another one of his inhuman, pleasant little smiles. "Before their dissent was silenced."

* * *

The morning light glinted off the town huts, glaring, harsh, into their eyes, and blinding their sight. Kylo and Hux had the Force to guide them, and Rey used her own internal map. Finn and Dameron likely had little experience in these environments. They stumbled and blustered through the sand, panting and coughing up dust.

They were not even close to arrival. The path from the ship to this centre hub had been enough in itself, but added to the meandering route they'd wound around the sand dunes across Rey's territory, it was frustrating. He wanted to strike the sand with his 'saber, watch it crystallise and melt and vaporise under his weapon's erratic bursts of pure, unharnessed energy.

But that would serve only to disturb the others.

 _Since when have you cared about the feelings of the people who witness your tantrums, Ren?_

 _Since they've been in possession of knowledge key to our success._

Hux huffed, broadcasting an incredulous sort of amusement. _I love how greatly you doubt the capabilities of our soldiers. They don't have any key knowledge, is that it?_

It was insulting, perhaps, to Hux, to know those he commanded weren't all that useful. It was not meant as an offence on his skill. Really, it was a miracle Hux had managed to train them thus far. Kylo knew he hadn't the patience to direct bumbling idiots for more than half a second, yet alone so many years. _Well, they don't._

 _I'm glad you think so highly of my abilities._ And it was genuine, Kylo could sense, underneath that sarcastic veneer, under the constant, fixed, vicious little smile.

 _You are likely the only one fit to lead these disposable masses. How does your patience not fray completely? Don't you ever want to throw a 'tantrum' yourself?_

 _Oh, frequently. It's not that I don't think highly of your own abilities, Ren. I might as well admit I have at least a modicum of respect for you if we're going to be sharing minds. I don't imagine either of us are used to this level of intimacy. I_ do _respect you. I only wish you would exercise some control._

The one problem with this mental connection was how little Kylo could keep from it on a passive, subconscious level. Actively, he could block anything, but that would soon tire him, and he needed the Force for much more important things. _Call me B-_ he began, and reeled. _Call me Kylo._

The instant correction didn't go unnoticed. But Hux simply shrugged, and asked, _How long have you had that name, besides? Not too long, I suppose._

 _Since I left the Jedi Order. Not all Knights of Ren have changed their names. It's a statement of rebirth to some, and an unnecessary clean slate to others. I chose to change mine because it is too well-known. I want that attention focused elsewhere. On my skill, not my blood._

 _And you couldn't really call yourself Ben Ren, could you?_

 _Not if I wanted to maintain any shred of dignity, General._

 _I wasn't aware dignity was something you cared all that much about._ Hux gave him a subtle, sidelong glance. He was teasing. He had the trust to show camaraderie. Kylo blinked. _If I call you Kylo, then you call me..._

 _You're not happy with your name, are you?_

 _You can call me Brendol if you wish. Hux is more my name than anything, I admit. But I should return the favour; it's only polite._

 _I'll call you what you want to be called,_ he offered, puzzled. _Hux is less formal than General. Brendol, Armitage, they are only your names if you want them to be. Do you? Want them to be?_

 _I'd accept it from you._ Hux seemed startled by this thought, and Kylo realised he, too, fell prey to his mental transparency as much as Kylo did his own. _Well, at least you know this isn't a front. Congratulations on being the one and only person who can tell when I'm lying, Kylo Ren. I hope you will be the first and the last._

 _The same goes to you... Brendol Armitage Hux._ Kylo mulled the name over in his mind. It fit, in a certain way. _You're aware you're a much more interesting person than your namesake, aren't you? You're compelling. Your father was simply talented. You have a_ gift.

Hux gave him a surprised stare. _You know, I daresay I'm beginning to quite like you. Next thing we know, the stars will orbit the planets, and Jakku will freeze over._

Kylo's pleased look was hidden beneath his mask, but he knew Hux could still sense it. _It may help to know I feel the same._

* * *

Rey seemed to sense their psychic conversations immediately. He could see her straining to pick up on something, only a faint whisper to her, a small murmur in the sound of the wind. She knew this planet like the back of her hand, and Kylo knew she would soon realise this wasn't nature's natural ambiance.

He would explain to her, should she ask. Denying great power would only delay things, not halt them entirely. And Kylo didn't particularly want them to halt at all, when the Order was so greedy for talent, when the army was in such desperate need of capable fighters, and when Rey clearly met every standard.

He would be instrumental in their rise to power. Finding others to equal him was not intimidating, not threatening. It simply was. Kylo could deem them worthy or he could not; Rey appeared worthy. He would not object to her alliance, but full cooperation was unlikely. She would never - could never - approve of Kylo's methods, or Hux's, or the Order's, no matter how convinced she was that they were attempting a reform.

She distrusted them, and he respected that. Her caution was an asset, as long as she stayed on their side. If the Order split territory between itself and the Republic, the Resistance would settle into wary vigilance, and so would Rey. This was his ultimate goal. Gain knowledge, gain power, gain true enlightenment in the Force. The more strength he and Hux amassed, the more potential they had in quelling all rebellion. Should they find the need to remove the Republic from the equation, his training with the Skywalkers would ensure it was seen to immediately.

Hux wanted his knowledge, his power to translate into control. Kylo wanted his to earn respect, _fear._ And their three associates wanted peace and happiness. He was not stupid enough to assume they would not come into conflict in the future. He knew the possible outcomes. Beat them or join them. Once the time came - and it would come - he would choose whichever one served to better further his interests in the longterm. And from what he knew thus far, he was fairly certain Hux would do the same.

In the current time, however, it was his job to keep that conflict from manifesting for as long as he could manage. And, if it were to actually help, placating Rey and her Resistance friends was a hardship he would gladly endure.

Though it was best to leave the true diplomacy to those more suited. Let Hux swindle the righteous and the indignant. Before Kylo took his 'saber's blade to all of their throats in sheer frustration.

* * *

"How much farther?" Finn asked, blinking stinging sweat from watering eyes. He looked like he'd drowned in a pool of his own sweat, uniform tarnished with smears of dust and debris. His steps were measured, even, but it was clear he'd much rather collapse.

"We're exiting the town now," Hux said, cheery, and turned to Rey. "Not too far from that run-down village of yours."

"It's not mine," Rey said, firm. "This place isn't my true home. My family are."

"They could live on Tatooine." Finn fiddled with his helmet nervously. "Or somewhere equally as... uh, dry. And unpleasant in general."

Rey shrugged. "Anywhere is better than here, to me. As soon as they find them, I never want to come back to this part of Jakku again in my life. I've seen too many terrible things here, I can never look at it the same way."

"You used to like it?"

"I'm not sure if you could call it 'like'. I thought of it a lot better than I do now, at least."

Kylo wondered what it was like, to call home a person and not a place. He had never truly felt at home anywhere except on the bridge of a starship, in streaming hyperspace, watching the stars blink around him. No place he knew felt like home, not Corellia, or Tatooine, or even the empty spot in space where Alderaan once used to spin. And Uncle Luke's temple belonged to him, not to Kylo, or to any of the padawans that had trained there.

Rey didn't know if her home was worth all the effort, Kylo realised. Her family could be cruel and merciless, and she could be pledging herself to their service, in her desperate attempt to grab at some sort of ideal, away from the harsh and bitter reality of Jakku, in all its elegant, empty, dead sand. For all she knew, Jakku was a better home than her family could ever be.

She would feel betrayed and disappointed, should she find them not to her liking. Perhaps she would return to Jakku, or perhaps she would rebel completely, join the Resistance, and settle nowhere except the bridge of a starship herself. Maybe the loss of something that could never have been real in the first place would drive her to violence and ruthlessness. He had to wait and see the results of this experiment, yet a sick, twisting feeling in the pit of his stomach told him he already had enough insight into the issue. He need only look in his parents' direction to see the effects of betrayal on such a scale.

He wondered if maybe they, too, would turn vicious without their imagined image of a son. They could no longer be proud parents. Their blood had poisoned more lives in the galaxy than it had ever healed, from the moment his great grandmother and, soon after, his grandmother's deaths had tainted his grandfather's psyche for eternity.

How did that feel? Kylo was proud of his innate genetic destruction, but Mother would despair. And his father must have called into question the moral soundness of the Solo bloodline many times over by now.

Kylo embraced it. The rest of his family ran from it, save for Anakin Skywalker himself. That was their undoing, Kylo thought. That they couldn't accept their own roots. One's alignment in the Force was entirely controllable, unless it was ceded to fear and paranoia. Which is precisely what his family had done.

Kylo was no paragon of insight. He felt clueless and lost at the best of times, especially now he'd given over his loyalty to an entirely new master. But the rest of the Skywalkers, in all their supposed wisdom, were secretly as ignorant as he, when it came to the truth about power in this universe. Maybe that was why Luke had shut himself away, to somehow gain understanding by meditating in isolation for a decade. Kylo didn't claim to know.

There was a small touch at his mind, and he returned his attention to the present, to Hux's windblown hair, blending in with the bright, glaring orange of the sparkling sand that surrounded them. _Will we let Rey know? Of our loyalty to your grandfather. She knows we are not with Snoke, but we haven't mentioned what prompted our little switch in allegiances._

 _Do you think it will impact her decision to stay?_

Hux hummed, mentally. Visibly, he was entirely composed, if not slightly introspective. Never enough for anyone to notice, and certainly a gift that came far more naturally to him than it had to Kylo. He needed a physical mask to conceal himself, but Hux had never needed more than the face he'd been given at birth. _She doesn't respect Vader like you do._

 _No, I get a general sense that she despises him and others like him. She is no Jedi, yet, but she will not turn to the Dark, this much is extremely clear._

 _She will find out eventually._

 _Yes, she will. At a more... appropriate time, I will tell her. Is this alright with you? You tear me down for my poor social cohesion and skill, Hux, but even I know telling her now will only result in... complete disaster. If I had more respect for this planet, I would fear for its survival in the event of such a clash of minds in the Force._

 _Are you saying a fight with Rey would rip this wasteland apart?_

 _You know the Force runs strong within you. Look at her yourself, and tell me she is not powerful. She could match me, easily. Whomever comes to meet and reunite with her in the end, I know they'll have a great birthright for her to claim. It's obvious._

 _So, you're not all that arrogant when it comes down to it, are you, then, Kylo?_

 _Denying the truth does not lead to enlightenment in the Force. I know this now._

Hux blinked. _Where you didn't before?_

Kylo subconsciously lifted his chin, appearing taller, as if this would somehow convince Hux he was not a fool to have made such a grave error in judgement. _Snoke had me resist the Light inside me. Now, I will accept its presence, and this will make me stronger, as it did my grandfather before me._

Hux huffed, almost pleased. _An impressive resolve to change._

Kylo bowed his head in return, just a small dip, so as to avoid notice. _You have my thanks, General._

* * *

Once they finally made their final approach to their consort ship, a great and terrible thing dawned: that they had even parked it at all. And on this Junker planet, with their vessel's arbitrary and useless security system. Kylo had a sudden sinking feeling that the ship would no longer be there to greet their arrival. _Hux?_

 _You raise a very good point,_ came the dry response. _I wish this had come up sooner. There's no chance it's still there._ A pause, and then, _Kriffing hells. Kark it all. We just lost our ship._

Kylo stopped in the sand and let it whip his face for some time, as Rey grew more and more on edge. "I sense we've lost our ship," he said, and Rey's eyebrows furrowed.

"Well, I wouldn't be surprised. But how can you be so certain?"

"I can't. But statistically, I'm right. The ship has been stolen."

Rey snorted. "Is that arrogance or pessimism?"

"Both," said Kylo, and stalked on.

Hux simply shrugged at their bemused faces and followed suit. _I assume you'll be advocating that we steal one?_

 _That is correct._ It was the least the people here deserved, as punishment for their crimes. Their ships would be inherently worthless from weather damage, but the inconvenience was enough. He worried for the tranquility of their flight, though, in such a beaten-down hunk of scrap. If he weren't among the talented, if he didn't have talent of his own, they would be a lot worse for wear. In far deeper waters.

Hux was clearly a great skeptic, but he kept his mouth shut and let Kylo stride forward in long paces, boots crunching against the sand. Kylo could sense from him that he found such theatrics irritating, but Kylo himself was irritated. The First Order could afford the loss of the ship, of that they were all sure after he had proved it time and time again, but the gall of these thieving scum, the damage this would do to the Order's reputation, if people saw that it took no more than a greedy scavenger on an equally as greedy planet to steal from them. It suggested that, if one were stupid enough, if one had the mettle, one was fit to do as one pleased with Order tech.

Those who tried it would be swiftly arrested, and put on trial in an Order court, likely to be executed. Though now they planned to overthrow Snoke's rule, the Order's attitudes towards harsh penalties like these would have to change. The Republic, and by extension the Resistance, would never so much as consider uttering a word to them if they acted, in his mother's words, like _"savages."_

Hux was clearly displeased. He did not need the Force to see this. _Once we reach the scene of the crime to confirm, we'll have to double back and head into the town again. This has all been a complete waste of time, you realise._

 _Yes, I realise._

 _All this for a map._ There was a huff, and then, _No! I'm not questioning its value. Only that it has indeed been a great pain in the ar-_

 _This... all of this... it will, you'll find, all be worth it. In the end._

This was met in the Force with clear disbelief. _You can't make statements like that, Kylo. We've no idea if this will prove to be worth it. The item itself is valuable, yes, in a purely objective sense, but mixed with the fact that your grandfather likely already knows where it leads? We could have pushed for him to tell us._

 _No. This was... a test. He was-_ testing _us. Our resolve. He wanted to know if we were... worth it? No, he knows we're worth the effort. He wanted to test our dedication. To the cause? To him?_

 _You don't know._

 _I don't claim to know everything Grandfather thinks. Do I? I've never- He wouldn't appreciate the intrusion._

 _It may be that this was what he intended for us. Along with the upside of having a physical copy of previously only mental knowledge, I suppose. A win/win, perhaps, in his eyes?_

All his experiences, all his knowledge of Vader, of Anakin, his personality and his tactics, it all supported this theory. _I believe, yes. It fits him. It's... characteristic._

 _Stop deliberating,_ Hux dismissed. _Ask him, for stars' sake._

 _I will, when we return to First Order space. I have to be sure, Hux. I know you doubt my ability to premeditate, but I do it frequently. More than you think._

 _Truly a miracle._ Hux chuckled to himself, lightly, shook his head, and moved on.

* * *

The site of the ship was emptier than it had been before they'd left it. As if they had never come at all, save for faint treads in the sand, where the ship had rested on its landing gear.

"I guess you're right," said Finn. "I mean, you were _so_ arrogant about it, I expected you to be completely wrong. But you're not. It's actually gone."

Dameron mocked, "Who could pass up such an opportunity? Because I'm sure that thing flies exceptionally well, y'know. Exceptionally."

"No, it's true," said Rey. "They wouldn't pass this up. Order tech like this may be cheap to you, but anything is valuable to them. And that this works as intended? That makes it more than just your average steal. They'll be all over this."

Kylo watched the grains at his feet blow with the wind, stream over the toes of his boots. They'd have to retrieve their party at the village, then begin the journey back towards the main trading hub in this dustbath. And have wasted so much time; a precious commodity now it was limited, stretched thin between the present and some ambiguous date in the future when Supreme Leader Snoke would realise he was neither supreme nor a leader. They needed maximised time to prepare, to stockpile weapons, to gain ties and favours, to ready themselves to become their own highest in command.

They hadn't even began. Not one foot had found its step on their path to success.

They could waste no more time. Not anymore.

* * *

 **Author's Note:** Definitely still a late ho, that hasn't changed.

I wanted to get a bit more metaphysical and contemplative in this chapter. But that may be because I was lamenting having to write action scenes that flow smoothly. I'll get them written! I'll just... procrastinate a little, first. Now school's started I have, like, zero excuse not to be focused on being productive tho.

Real talk, actual action is on its way. Enjoy some armchair psychology in the meantime? xx Thanks for the patience. I'm forever grateful to all of you.


	10. Escape

The town centre was as drab as they had left it, only now sprinkled with bustling sentient life. In the Force, their spirits were too dull to make a difference. Like looking at a million moulds, empty replicas of true existence.

The same could be said of their own gathering, the 'Troopers resting on the hot sand, saying nothing, only panting like dogs against the heat. Rey stood at the top of the knoll, surveying their surroundings. "We'll find ships all around the outskirts. We need to pick one and leave. If we stand around for more than a minute, the entire settlement will get suspicious."

Hux sighed. "Will any do?"

"Any will fly. I can't promise they'll fly very well, though."

"So we pick one that looks in decent condition."

"Correct."

Kylo examined their limited selection closely. From here, he could make out only the bare basics: an insignia here and there, evidence of lasercannon damage, parts falling off. There were scant few that seemed even able to make it off this rock and into the sky, let alone take them into hyperspace.

He wasn't pleased with their chances.

Kylo asked, "Which would you pick?"

Rey hummed. "There's a decent looking freighter over there, a little to our right, see? Doesn't look too slow, but will carry our people and weapons. That'll do."

Hux gave a hesitant grumble. "And it won't kill us?"

"None of us could possibly let that happen," Rey said, sparking with something that was almost offence.

Hux frowned. _We'll see to that yet,_ Kylo heard, a sour little echo. He found he agreed.

* * *

His 'Troopers scrabbled down the hill on legs as wobbly as newborns, and Kylo lamented the state of the Order once more. For all Hux tried, for all Hux put in every scrap of his effort, their soldiers were still unreliable, and, on one of their better days, only slightly imbecilic.

He had no issue sliding down the sand with grace, not until the very end, when Hux's pointed internal jabs at the prideful way he held himself grew too frustrating.

 _You look like you've forced yourself into a neck brace, Kylo, by the gods. We hold our heads high when we address the Order, not when we walk - with as much subtlty as our little gathering can, I might add - into a town of suspicious con artists._

Kylo frowned. If he appeared imposing, perhaps he could frighten this wasteland's inhabitants into offering up their ships for his choosing. _I've been trained to present myself as a threat and nothing else since the day I was taken in as a Knight._

Hux shook sand off his boots, looking mildly amused. Everything Kylo did was entertainment to him; it was unsettling. He was used to Snoke's scrutiny, but Hux's was of an entirely different breed. He could never tell which way it ran - to contempt, or to simple curiosity.

 _I would applaud your paranoia if it weren't so... insistent. You truly don't know how to quiet your mind, do you, Ren?_

 _I have never had reason to._ It was the honest truth. He wasn't blind enough to believe there were no Force-sensitives in the Order, but none that he particularly minded hearing the loudest of his anger. Until Hux, who had the sheer daring to tell him to "mind his mental manners". Snoke didn't talk to him enough for it to be considered a nuisance, and Grandfather was no doubt able to shut out all outside sources. Hux was, in fact, the only person he knew who had ever cared to listen to him for more than five seconds of short, barked commands.

 _Now that's just sad. Don't you have a diary to talk to?_

He was exceedingly aware of Hux's opinion of him - that he was a childish sycophant with an attitude problem, a Rebel brat at birth, the esteemed but unworthy child of its greatest leaders. _Very funny, General._

 _That's not precisely true,_ Hux corrected. _I believe you'd benefit greatly from an entire shipload of therapists, but I don't think of you as Snoke's boot-licking, immature little lackey. You're clearly Anakin Skywalker's instead, of course._

Kylo couldn't supress his father's pride. _Come off it._

Hux huffed. _I'm only joking. What a sensitive soul you are. Tell me, if your precious grandfather turned out to be an unhinged maniac, would you drop him as you did Snoke? Do you pledge your loyalty on a whim? Or is it only by chance that you're switching masters like bandages?_

 _Chance!_ Kylo gave him an incredulous glare. _You don't believe I_ need _controlling to live, do you? I only serve those who are worthy. Grandfather is worthy. If he were a sentimental fool like his son, maybe then I would reconsider._

 _He is a sentimental fool. He's looking out for you, isn't he? His darling grandson, his adored Skywalker heir._

 _It's not sentiment that drives him. He wants to see me rise to power. His concern for my happiness and well-being is entirely dependent on my honouring the family name, and even then. He will not shed tears if I die._

 _Darth Vader wouldn't shed tears if you died, no, but you forget Vader isn't the only one occupying that body. The Sith Lord whose every move you worship? He was the hollow shell of your blood grandfather._

 _Anakin Skywalker would shed no more tears than Darth Vader._

Hux stared blankly. _And I thought_ I _had the least faith in my blood, out of this whole galaxy, but you're quite a worthy rival. I know for a fact Brendol Hux I gave as much of a damn about me as he did the dust at his feet, but you don't know anything at all of the feelings your family harbours for you, don't claim to deny it. Vader could project any emotion he pleased your way, and from your resentment, I don't imagine your birth parents were all that transparent. Really, your uncle was the only one who ever made a show of loving you. And yet he was the one you betrayed._

Kylo winced, flinched back. _I did not betray him. I betrayed the Jedi he trained. He could be dead, couldn't he? But he lives, because I allow it._

 _Your family may act as if they don't care, Ren, but that's all it is - an act. The Skywalkers_ are _sentimental fools, every single one of them, and there's not a sentient mind in this whole universe who doesn't know it._

There was a pointed cough from behind them. "Could you two lovebirds move along?" Dameron motioned impatiently. "Do I have to say 'please'?"

Kylo bristled, but Hux simply waved him along. "Would you like an apology?" he asked. "Pardon me. I'm very sorry for discussing Order business with my partner."

Dameron tilted his head, along with his little droid. "You haven't said anything in the past- oh. Oh, you're having it telepathically." He frowned, turned to Finn. "How could you work for these people? No transparency! None!"

"I mean, to be fair, they did kidnap me."

Hux remained dispassionate. "The Jedi kidnapped children, too, if I recall."

Rey shrugged. "At least they were kind to theirs."

"So they have no faults?" Hux himself was bristling now. "Please, tell me about how flawless the Jedi Order was, and how its problems were pure tragedy and always a result of the Sith."

Rey held up a hand. "They weren't perfect, but they were a _lot_ better than this."

Kylo opened his mouth to retort, to systematically destroy all her fantasies and falsehoods about the oh-so-great Jedi Order, but Hux just shrugged and allowed her to sit and seethe. "It depends on your definition of 'better,'" he said, and left it at that.

* * *

At the base of the knoll, Kylo could see clearly the awful state their escape vessels had been left to stew in. Rey did preliminary checks over their functionality, searching for any potentially fatal design errors, and then resigned herself to choosing the least decayed. "I'll need to survey the rest of the docking lots," she began, ticking off some unknown list against her fingers. "Many meet the criteria, but only one of these will have to do. We can't take a whole fleet." She paused. "Can we?"

"We won't insist on our First Order flourish, if that's what you're asking." Hux smiled. "You know this place better than any. The choice belongs to you."

Rey stopped. "I'll decide after I've seen it all," she said, and led on.

Kylo trailed her, to avoid suspicion, not that he imagined it would do much good in a town like this. Nonetheless, he knew how to be cautious when the situation required it.

The dust swirled and brushed around them like cat-tails, licking at their ankles and sliding into their boots. Without the Force, he couldn't see a thing, which was perhaps Rey's ultimate goal. Those who cannot see cannot be seen.

When the dust parted, to flickers of light on metal, then Rey would rest against a nearby pole and pretend to be engrossed in counting credits, while they all let their eyes take their fill. No prospect was particularly promising. Run-down rustbuckets, nothing that Kylo would bet his life on breaching the atmosphere with.

Through every gap in the dust, Kylo caught glimpses of wary faces, the worn scavengers like vultures over their kill. Rey herself was clearly set on edge by these bottomfeeders. They were a threat, of course, but manageable, with time. Why bother with such open caution? They had to walk with confidence. That was the image the Order had always presented, and would always present.

"They'll move their ships if they suspect," Rey said, to his unsaid question. "We'll need to move farther into the town. I can't risk alerting them."

"We can't scout ships we can't see," Finn began, then paused. "Can we? Man, don't tell me..."

Hux's amused laughter settled over their tense shoulders, their rigid postures. "We can, yes. Quite the feat, wouldn't you say?"

"I'm gonna have to say, though, aren't I?" Finn sighed, and began to trail forward into the village heart. "That's the thing."

* * *

Chimes made of plating sheets stripped off the hulls of once-great ships greeted them in the town centre. Old, weathered people, their skin lined with scars and a sheen of sweat, hunched over workbenches and focused callous hands on melding liquid metal. Heat radiated off every surface, and Kylo was suddenly suffocating.

"Has this been your entire life?" he asked, and Rey turned to him, almost affronted.

"And what about yours?"

"I've _moved,_ " he protested, feeling the thick blanket of Hux's perpetual smug amusement pressing down against his back. He glared. _You don't like this place any more than I do, admit it._

 _Oh, gladly. You're just so defensive; it's entertaining._

Kylo ducked under the cover of his robes. Entertaining. As if he were some spectacle to be watched from afar. This was what had become of his family's legacy. A lightshow.

Was that all he was now? A lightshow for the galaxy to ogle? Was that what Grandfather thought of him, staring down at his puppets, wondering when to make them dance, when it was time to finally cut the strings? He wanted, then, more than ever, to know what went on in Darth Vader's ghostly mind. Kylo could reach out and pass a hand through his grandfather's very head, but he could no more grasp his thoughts than he could grasp the air he breathed. Or could not breathe, in Vader's case.

He wanted that transparency to extend beyond the visual. He wanted to know the plan his ancestors had in store for him. He wanted to see. He had to see.

He collided sharply against something firm and warm, then, which had a faint smell of grease and dust, and an eerie familiarity. Kylo opened his eyes to find an average junker, his arms full with bag after bag of presumed haul. "Watch where you're going, bud," he growled, and pushed forward.

Kylo didn't budge an inch. _How dare a lowlife try to lecture me on manners!_

"I said," the junker spat, now pushing with all his might against Kylo's unmoving weight, " _watch_ where you're going!"

Swiftly, Kylo kicked out a leg and tripped him. "I'll offer the same advice to you," he said, slowly.

The man below him squirmed in the dust like a snake, and reared up, dropping his haul and raising his fists, likely to fight hand-to-hand, but Kylo wasn't interested. He held the scavenger scum in place with the Force, and looked down only at the parts scattered across the sand below. New metal, clearly from the hull of an unsuspecting ship, painted in glaring white with an insignia he knew better than his own face. Gargling and spitting, the junker managed, "Just move!"

"What is this?" Kylo asked, instead.

The poor, pathetic, miserable little thing shrunk into himself at this. "Important business."

"That's the First Order's emblem. What are you doing with First Order equipment?"

"Whaddaya think?"

"You stole it," Kylo offered, and thanked the stars that the heat rising in his face was disguised by the desert weather. The element of surprise was always an advantage.

"Damn right I did, like everyone else in this town. Now, excuse me, I have places to go-"

Kylo wasn't listening. "You're the one who stole our ship," he said, simply.

 _Now isn't the time,_ came Hux's voice.

 _Now is exactly the time._

"So what if I am? Not the first one to lose a ship around here. Y'know what they say, you snooze, you-"

Kylo gripped at his throat and choked the small vole of a man as hard as he could. A crowd, the vole's friends, scuttled forward to support him, but Kylo was too far gone to care they were outnumbered. They could take the hit. Trash like this never got very far.

 _Ren, honestly-_

He let the man grapple frantically at his neck. "No. Please. Continue," Kylo said, beatific. "I want to hear the rest."

"Ren," Hux said, yanking his words from the comforting shawl of telepathy and into the harsh, audible present, "that's enough."

Kylo let the shaking creature drop, let him gather his things, and gasp like a man drowned, inhaling dust-laden air and choking and sobbing like the miserable wreck he was. The others seemed affronted to see their colleague so humiliated. They had blasters at the ready, their faces vicious and contorted like wild animals. It was amusing to watch them flounder. "Very well, General."

As the thief clawed at the hot dirt beneath him, he angled his neck like a crooked branch towards his compatriots, and screeched, "Get him! Get all of 'em!"

They let loose the first volley of blasterfire immediately, but Kylo had been expecting a skirmish to break, and managed to halt the first bolts. "We don't have much time. Rey, choose a ship. Now. Hux?"

"I'll keep them occupied." Briefly, he snapped his gaze over towards their defective 'Troopers. "Everyone else, follow Rey, and get in the thrice-damned ship without making a fuss."

The whole town, now, was feeling the thieves' rage, everyone turning left and right to point accusations, to squabble like the uncivilised. Heat from passing blasterbolts singed his clothes, and in a second, he saw Rey scrabbling forward to another ship, some backwater Corellian freighter, running to it from the flaming wreck of her first pick. Lasercannons. Force, this place was truly the pit.

Soon, they were scattering among themselves, boots rattling the ground like drums, desperately following to their new shelter. He passed Finn, ducking in the sand to avoid blasts, grumbling, "This ship isn't gonna make it off the ground, let alone fly, and don't even talk about withstanding this bolt party."

From his place behind some stray speeder, he saw Hux standing, eerily still, in the middle of their sights.

He begged, _What are you doing?_

 _Trying something._ Hux knelt to the ground, and in the Force, Kylo felt a sudden pull, a shift of gravity, clear before him. Soon, the sand was tumbling around him, circling and circling, spinning itself a cyclone to wrap right around Hux's dusty form. Then, Hux let it loose, and everything was chaos. _To the ship! Get to the ship!_

Kylo leapt from cover, ignoring the pain of the sand catching against his skin, tearing long, red lines, and ran pace-by-pace at Hux's side. _How did you- how did you... manage that?_

 _I haven't the slightest. I used your training. Thanks, for that. I'm saving your sorry souls once again._ A burst of frustration, annoyance, biting sarcasm. _You know how I do so love to keep things routine._

Then, with one final push, they were tumbling head-over-heels into the main hold of the freighter, whose controls Rey and Dameron had already commandeered, and watching as they were lifted, jerky, up into the sky, and hauled into Jakku's atmosphere at top, dizzying speed.

Kylo blinked, and then leant forward to spit up dust. They were out. Free. Hopefully for good.

* * *

 **Author's Note:** KYLO WILL CLUE IN SOON. SOON. JUST GIVE HIM A MOMENT TO ADJUST, HE HAS TO CONTINUE TO BE EXTRA, AFTER ALL.

I was away in China for a while, and then got bombarded with schoolwork, but I'm back to the land of the living now! Sorry for the late update.


	11. Precious

They were lurching through space and Kylo felt, frankly, that he might vomit. "I thought you said you could pilot," he snapped, and saw stars, both literal and metaphorical. The ship's centre of gravity was just slightly off, and it was churning his stomach like butter. "This isn't... that. This is amateurish-" another wave of nausea hit, and he staggered. "Were you lying?"

"There's just something wrong with the inertial dampeners!" Rey insisted, waving her hands around blindly. "This ship is old and unused. She's not going to fly up to your standards."

Dameron smirked. "Also, she's a piece of bantha shit. This model was good for racing, at its time a couple decades ago, and now it's not even that. Seriously, it's outclassed by at least, what, thirty other ships, and that's just recently."

"Your knowledge is very impressive," Hux allowed, "but your flying is going to give us all motionsickness. Please. Fix the karking thing."

"Soon!" Rey said. "Give me a little while to explore her engines first. She hasn't aged well; nobody's taken care of her." She looked offended, on the ship's own behalf. It was just the kind of stupidly noble thing Jedi did. Kylo could see it in her.

"As long as you get her working," Hux grunted, rubbing absently at his temples. From the Link, Kylo could sense an answering vague nausea, and a great feeling of annoyance.

 _I am no more pleased to be in this situation than you are,_ came Hux's mental voice. Even as all people were distinct in the Force, Hux felt especially unique. Every word still came with the sharp taste of blood, a lingering disdain dripping from every unspoken letter. Though, he found it mellowed to something more like salt when only Kylo himself was around, a little lighter, a little less suffocating, less constricting around the throat. _Oh, don't get soft on me, now. It's only the salt from my sweat at all the stress you cause me._ Hux was snorting internally, but Kylo still knew it was true. Hux hated him less than he hated everyone else, and that in itself was an achievement.

 _Of course, General._ Kylo's face betrayed nothing, and yet Hux sighed.

 _Stop playing demure. You're letting this grow your ridiculously disproportionate ego. Don't deny it._

Kylo only continued to stare.

* * *

In the dead of the night cycle, while Kylo and Hux lay dizzy and ill in their shared quarters, he appeared again to them. Grandfather's spirit. He was still like no ghost Kylo had ever seen, shimmering and somehow solid, never flickering, an unwavering force of nature. His face was always settled in a mask of slight amusement, just on the edge of condescending, his voice always a touch patronising; Kylo had never seen him break the façade. He'd caught small traces of anger here and there, but it wasn't explosive, like the countenance Vader was rumoured to have possessed, only a faint frustration. Neither Hux nor Kylo had yet to say something to make him go cold, or sick with rage. It was a remarkable patience for an impatient man.

Kylo wanted it. But something terrible in him suspected such peace came only with death.

"Grandfather." He bowed, low, while Hux only groaned and rolled over in his bed, bunching the sheets.

He said, eventually, "You don't have all too wonderful a sense of timing, do you, Skywalker?"

"No, General. I don't tend to."

Hux threw his hands back, to lay his head to rest on his arms. "Always catch your enemies by surprise."

"I have hope you are not witless enough to become my enemy."

This received no proper reaction. "You'd catch us by much more than just surprise, yes, I've heard posturing before."

Kylo choked. "Show his Lordship some respect, Hux-"

"You have almost impressive daring for one so young," Grandfather continued, unaffected by the blatant insubordination. "Use it on someone who truly intends on antagonising you. I'm here to guide you onto the correct path, not to disturb your sleep out of some pointless need to keep up appearances." He saw a small smirk curl at the edges of Grandfather's mouth then, one Kylo wondered about frequently, if Vader had hidden that side of himself within the armour, or if this was the part of Anakin that had burnt away in the fires of Mustafar. "Though, I've gotta admit, that is a bonus."

"A Skywalker who makes smart remarks," Hux said, voice drier than the wreck of a planet they'd just dragged themselves from. "Will wonders never cease?"

This received a hearty chuckle from Vader, which had the opposite and unexpected effect of being entirely terrifying to everyone else. Even Hux was on the edge of intimidation, staring Vader squarely down, trying to piece him together as he did all the others. Kylo knew he would fail.

The unsettling effect of Vader's laughter remained, a cold chill under his skin, but he also had the abrupt feeling he was missing things. Grandfather was always one step ahead, always busy attending to business Kylo couldn't fathom to save his life. What duties did ghosts have to fulfill? Kylo's tutelage was clearly a result of one of Vader's many commitments. He could see much more than the living, that much was clear, fluorescent eyes constantly tracking invisible movements, smirking mouth always delivering information no-one with physical boundaries or the limits of a beating heart could ever have found out.

"Perhaps they won't," said Grandfather. "Would you like to know another Skywalker trait, Hux?" He waited a beat for Hux to cautiously nod his head. "We're all good pilots." He winked, as if this were some internal joke they were supposed to understand. Kylo knew it as truth, and why would the truth be so much a joke to them? "Speaking of," he said, beaming now with Anakin's grin, "do you recognise this model at all, Kylo?"

"The ship? I was... distracted, at our time of departure. The Resistance Fighter mentioned it has now been far outclassed, but he didn't name it."

The trickery in Anakin's expression grew further. "Anything feel off about it?" Like an excited child, his grandfather couldn't seem to stay still. "Anything at all?"

"What... what are you trying to make me see?" Kylo held up a hand, to request silence, and then rested a cheek against the ship's hull. "She is strong with the Force, for an outdated Junker throwaway," he allowed. "Very strong. Almost... a singular entity." Aside from the dead man floating before him, he hadn't been with his true blood since his early childhood, but something about this ship made him feel again a youngling, grasping onto his mother and father like a lifeline. "I know this place."

"Go on, give the model a guess."

"Is that what you were trying to say?" Kylo blinked.

Slowly, carefully, Grandfather said, "YT. It's a YT model. Corellian. One of the older ones, older than you. But not so old as to be useless when you were small. Pretty much the opposite. I think you get what I'm saying."

Hux huffed, impatient and bubbling over with frustration. "Can you not just outright say it?"

"My master was very vague, even after my training," Grandfather replied. "I thought I might give it a try. He did it better, to be honest with you, but it's _fun,_ and an old man needs a little fun sometimes."

"You're Darth Vader," Hux told him, stupidly.

Instead of the expected smug pride, or possibly even shame and remorse, Grandfather only seemed delighted. "I bet it's great to know more about historical figures, huh? You seem like the type, Hux, one of the pioneers. You like discoveries, don't you? And this is one big discovery. Think of the headlines you'd make over the Holonet. I only wish they'd actually believe you."

"Everyone knew Anakin Skywalker was a joker," Hux said, hesitant.

"But no-one knew Anakin Skywalker was Darth Vader."

"That's unbelievable in itself, but I must admit, I thought your personality was exaggerated. In both forms. Anakin is the young Jedi's childhood hero, some shining beacon of hope and joy to look up to, too bright to exist. And Vader is precisely the opposite. Everything this world cowers away from. But neither are real. Both are caricatures."

"You're not wrong," Grandfather allowed. "So, if I did happen to be playing it up a little, which I can neither confirm nor deny, by the way, it wouldn't be for you, but for my grandson." There was a long pause. "He has preconceived notions of me; I'd like to dismantle each of them. I cannot teach a student who firmly believes everything they know isn't simply a watered-down truth. Exaggerations can teach. I will live by them, if that is the method that works best." A sigh. "It's not like sitting around will do anything. Ben won't budge unless I push and shove."

Kylo, in this moment, didn't quite find it in himself to care his role model embraced the Light as much as the Dark, or that he was apparently more stubborn than his grandfather would like. Instead, he was reeling, dizzy, at the sight of the ship he stood in. "She's the _Falcon._ "

"Back with the living?" Grandfather smiled pleasantly. "Well, in a manner of speaking. Welcome to your childhood home, Ben. At the next station, I'd recommend cleaning her up before she falls apart. You're right about a few things, Junkers can't treat a ship how she should be treated, and sand wears away at everything like nothing else in this kriffing starsystem."

Hux spluttered. "The _Milennium Falcon?_ You're toying with us."

"I save all the toying for my enemies," Anakin dismissed. "No, I'm being honest with you. Look for yourselves. A lifetime of upholding legends leaves its mark. I wanna get my hands on her engines, but I'm literally positive that'd set Rey on me, and nobody wants that. She's possessive of this endearingly malfunctioning, rusted, half-broken relic already, even after a handful of hours. I don't even need the Force to sense it. Reminds me of my oldest padawan."

Hux raised an eyebrow. "You had a padawan?"

Anakin hummed. "Is that an insult, General? I had multiple. All of them tried to kill me. Which is a lot better than it sounds, promise. Each assassination attempt was a moment of great personal pride for me, y'know. Vader inspires hate, which breeds more hate, which births more Sith, which in turn gets Vader's Emperor off his back-"

"Stop," Kylo said. "Please. You _are_ toying with me. Why did you lead me here?"

"I might be," Anakin said. "I'm dead and bored and I don't like seeing the same mistakes twice. It gets dry. And I didn't lead you here, you did that yourself. Give yourself some credit, you're a Skywalker. Getting yourself into trouble is in your genes."

"It can't be simple coincidence that I'm here."

"It could be the Force. Even the dead don't know its every move. It's possible the _Falcon's_ signature drew you in. The Force doesn't really think, but it has a way of getting its every user to learn a lesson in the end. This, Ren, is your lesson. Learn it. This is something I can't teach you."

"How is the _Falcon_ my lesson?"

"Beats me," Anakin said, with a shrug. "Anyway, people to see, places to go. I'll see you 'round."

And then he was gone, out of their sight like a flame being extinguished, a match suffocated in the wind. Kylo stared at the place he once stood for minutes after it had gone cold and lifeless.

"What in the _karking hells_ is it that's so very _wrong_ with your family, Ren?"

"If I knew," Kylo said, "I wouldn't be here."

* * *

Kylo spent the rest of the night tracking down every holoreel he could find of his grandfather, from birth to death. Every movement, he studied, in every transmission, from every source. Skywalkers fought brilliantly, but more than that, old habits died very, very hard. The more he looked, eyes unblinking and watering, the more Anakin and Vader seemed to blend into each other. Take the humanity, the joy out of every movement Anakin made, and replace it with a sort of empty grace, moves made out of obligation rather than the creative heat of battle, and there stood Vader in the ashes.

They spoke like two different people, but they moved the same. They always moved the same.

If Han Solo saw him now, dripping in robes and shrouded with metal, would he still see his son? Did Ben and Kylo move the same, as Anakin and Vader did?

In his right hand, an image of Anakin, pointing an accusing finger to a chained figure, his face angled towards a younger Obi-Wan Kenobi, similarly amused eyes now dimmed. _"You see, Master, people fail us. This is why I stick to tech."_

In his left, an image of Vader, overlooking a viewscreen littered by a corpse, turning away with a cold, _"You have failed me for the last time."_

A lifetime of whittling down an exaggerated brightness, and even it will become dark.

For Kylo, it didn't take even half as much time.

* * *

Kylo saw Anakin in his own mirrored movements, from then on. He found himself so caught up in it all, he walked straight over the maintenance bay, dodging Rey's nimble fingers curled around a hydrospanner, but not avoiding a harsh, grating scrape against a stray grate.

"Watch where you're going!" Rey snapped, pointing the 'spanner up at him. Then, she turned, all warm smiles, to the droid. "You tread carefully, don't you, Bee-Bee? Honestly, this world has it backwards. Artificial life is much more trustworthy, more reliable, don't you think?" She rubbed the eagerly chirping droid by the head, and laughed. "You certainly agree, don't you?"

Kylo stopped where he stood and peered down at her. "What was that... what was it that you just said?"

"Can I help you?" Rey soured. "I was just saying, droids are far better partners than people. They won't almost knock hydrospanners on top of you."

"You think droids are more reliable?"

Rey's glare narrowed. "Is that something you have a problem with?"

"No," said Kylo, blankly. "I agree."

He turned the corner, away from Rey's shocked face, to his quarters, to the holoreels. He had more to study. He would see what Grandfather saw; the Force flowed to him naturally, thoughtlessly, within these walls.

* * *

"How does he do it?" Kylo growled, eventually, and Hux looked over to him in surprise.

"Do what?"

" _Know_ everything."

Somewhat like an overflowing glass, Hux's amused expression rose and rose until he was chuckling, gravelly, and then barking a kind of startled-out laughter. "I'm sorry," he said. "It's admittedly rather rude, but- sometimes you just miss it completely. You could kill us all and yet you still think your grandfather is some kind of god."

"I don't think that," Kylo huffed. "I know what it takes to make people seem like gods. The First Order has never had a greater talent. But you have to admit that Grandfather is... not without ulterior motives."

"Aside from being entertained by the mere mortals?" Hux began to settle. "No, you're right, he knows something. But probably not nearly as much as you think. In fact, I can guarantee it. You know, I missed my own Force-sensitivity my whole life. It doesn't bring enlightenment like the holoreels say it does."

"It's easy to miss," Kylo protested.

"Your defence of my utter cluelessness is very touching, Ren, but don't be obtuse. Did _you_ miss it?"

That was no argument at all, not when hurled at the person who once was Ben Solo, a unity of two incomprehensibly stubborn, overly-lucky, and stupidly powerful families. "I come from Jedi blood."

"Hells, who knows what the old man was hiding from me?" Hux shrugged. "Brendol could've been a kriffing Knight of the Order for all I know. He told me nothing and expected me to know everything." He went quiet, his mood lowering in controlled, smooth motions. "I don't know why I'm telling you this."

Half of him, his father's half, called desperately to brush off this comment, but it was too little, too late, and his mouth had already curled down into a wince. "We're partners," Kylo insisted. "Knowing each other will help us learn, and become better."

"Strength in numbers is a critical concept for you, isn't it?" Hux asked, but he sensed it was rhetorical. "No, you're right. We're running a coup together, you're teaching me _magic,_ and I'm neck-deep in your family issues already. Should I be offended we're not engaged yet?"

Kylo flushed, and gave a slight laugh. "I'm aware. It's a joke. But... still, I'm sorry if it's too much. I understand that the experience is. Unique. And a burden."

"More the former than the latter, Ren. No need for Skywalker waterworks."

But it was well-meant, and Kylo went back to studying holos, his mouth slightly upturned.

* * *

They were sailing smooth waters, Dameron and Rey doting over his ship like worried mothers, until their path set back to populated space. Finn was biting his nails, asking if he should man the lasercannons, pacing around like the Force was using him as a weighted pendulum. "Stop clicking around," Hux bit out. "You're going to drive us all mad."

"We're gonna get attacked," Finn snapped. "And I'd like to not die when that happens, thanks."

Kylo could sense something rising, a presence that held an outstretched hand to him, trying every so often to grab, to snatch away. They were approaching someone he didn't _want_ to recognise, the smell of spice and brandy and oil, salty-sweet dry wit, the bitter taste of cynicism. He knew precisely who was tracking them down, precisely who was coming to reclaim his lost property.

Grandfather had known, somehow. He'd foreseen this. It was a test, but not like Snoke's. He was not to prove the Dark in him, but what the Light meant, what he could use of it without ruining himself, without tipping the scales. Unlike Snoke, Vader didn't want him to kill Han; in fact, Kylo had a sinking feeling the two got along. But facing his father was close to an impossibility. There were too many things that could be said, that shouldn't be said, and yet had to be.

 _I sense my father approaching,_ Kylo told Hux, hushed even in his mind. It took all of Hux's strength not to shoot around right then and there and stare, Kylo could see it in the line of his shoulders, stiffening and holding rigid.

 _Pardon me? Did I just hear you say - excuse me, think - your_ father _is coming?_

 _He is. I can feel his mind._

Hux groaned at leant against the bulkhead, looking as if he'd been hit over the head by something blunt. "Bad day?" Finn asked.

"Quite."

 _When are you going to inform the crew of this pertinent information?_

Kylo shifted. _What do I say?_

 _Oh, I don't know, how about a polite, "It's come to my attention that Han bloody Solo is approaching"? That would work._

 _There's nothing we can do,_ he insisted, firm. _Han will never leave without the_ Falcon _back safely in his hands._

 _You could at least do everyone the courtesy of letting them know. We do want them to trust us, don't we?_

 _Very well._ And Kylo cleared his throat, feeling watched, picked apart under Hux's gaze. The modulator distorted it enough that all rose and paid attention. "Someone's coming," he began, and Rey startled.

"What? Who? Not the Order?"

"No." Kylo looked away. "Someone who wants his ship back."

"He must be married to it, for stars' sake, if he's going _this_ far. Who would even come back for this, let alone track it down?" Finn wrinkled his nose. "That doesn't make sense."

"This place is precious to him, beyond all things. To him, it is as holy as a Jedi temple."

Finn snorted. "What's it, like, his kid or something?"

Kylo stopped, stomach twisting, knotting his throat. He felt cold, despite the thermostat's proper functioning. "More precious even than that."

* * *

 **Author's Note:** EVERY TIME I TRY TO WRITE ANAKIN BEING SERIOUS, I FUCKING DON'T. It's not like I don't know how. See: any of my fics not tagged with crack. It's just that I seem to not actually refrain from snorting it all too often.

When will adulthood actually hit me? Or will I be screaming "dARTH VADER IS A WISEASS AND I LIVE ON THIS" my whole life? It's possible.

Also, please note I have no soul. And I like breaking things. Forgive me.

Edit: sO I'M A LATE HO. BUT ROGUE ONE IS OUT. DARTH VADER IS A WISEASS CONFIRMED I WILL FITE U ON THIS I WILL LITERALLY FUCKING FITE U.

Edit 2: i mean. im keeping the note bc i _still_ can't write anakin being serious but. sorry for the lateness. it's been pretty hard to finish the other chapters, yk? im gutted. we lost an absolute legend way too fucking young. god. she was an inspiration.


	12. Out of Luck

"So what do we do?" Finn asked. "Seriously, if this guy is gonna take his ship, where does that leave us?"

"He might allow us to stay onboard," Kylo began. "Possibly."

He'd wanted desperately to avoid this situation. Everything in him was screaming to run, to get out, to never face his father again, but it was already too late. Han would never let the _Falcon_ go, not if it meant he had to forfeit his own life.

And Grandfather didn't want that of him, likely no matter what either of them had to say about it. It was such a change from Snoke, such a drastic difference in viewpoints, and Kylo was still spinning with it. He couldn't kill Han, but he couldn't see him either. He lost control in the Force often, and being confronted with so many memories, on top of the _Falcon's_ own signature, he couldn't know what would happen. And ruining the ship with his 'saber would likely get _him_ killed instead.

"Possibly doesn't sound very definite, buddy." Dameron raised an eyebrow. "You know who it is, right? So, tell us."

"You may not know how to deal with what you hear," Kylo hedged, which only got him a loud snort.

"How long d'you think I've been in this damn organisation? A year? I've seen as bad as you have - worse. I think my fragile form can handle a little information."

"That's not it," he said. "It's who it is. You know him. All of you."

Dameron stopped. "What?"

Kylo inhaled through his nose, and briefly drifted further into his Link with Hux, who didn't visibly startle, but made a confused noise in his mind. _You have. Clarity. Focus. I'm in need of it._

 _Well, I- I wasn't aware that was possible. To borrow skills from someone else. But by all means._

 _It is possible, but only in the strongest of Links. Thank you._

Hux stared, bemused. _Strongest? I've barely learnt anything of the Force._

 _It's about what we can gain, from each other. How we can become a stronger whole, from two distinct parts._ Kylo cleared his throat, then, and said, finally, "The man looking for this ship is Han Solo. It belongs to him."

Rey and Finn both choked, but Dameron only shook his head. "I should've known. He know his kid's on board? Or is that just happy coincidence?"

"He will have a faint idea."

"How's that?"

"He can sense me."

Dameron looked unimpressed. "Seriously, how's that?"

"I'm not sure," Kylo admitted. "He's always had an awareness in the Force, one that he shouldn't actually have. But he's always denied it. He thinks it's luck. But the odds of that are... close to impossible. It would consequently explain why my Force power has grown so exponentially. Blood on both sides."

"So, you're telling me, you, the estranged son, think Han Solo's got Force-sensitivity, and he's out to get us right now, convinced we've stolen his ship. And you said we _might_ be able to stay? You've lost it. Not that you had much in the first place."

Kylo scowled. "He would never open fire on a ship full of probable civilians. Chewbacca has less control over his anger, but he _still_ couldn't do it. They claim they're smugglers, but they've spent more of their life with Jedi than with common criminals."

"Hold up," Finn said. "Hold up a kriffing second, here. What's this about Wannabe Sith being Han Solo's _son?_ "

"Yeah, I know, I don't like it any more than you do." Dameron shrugged. "But yeah, the kid's his. He gets the dramatics from both sides, too, not just the power."

"What- shouldn't you be with your dad or something?" Finn asked. "Like, 'Heads up, Dad, we aren't actually thieves and junkers, and we got your ship back! Please don't tell Mom.'" He paused. "Oh, gods, Mom. Your mom is Leia Organa. Also Leia Skywalker. Your uncle is _Luke Skywalker._ Why are you here being all- _you,_ when you could be with your legitimate family of actual legends? They're some of the bravest people to ever exist; they _saved_ you. And yet you're spending time with us? Us in the white suits we can't see out of? With the leader of an army that seriously wants to destroy entire planets? Multiple of them. At once. There's something wrong there, man. That's not just ungrateful, it's... kind of like spitting directly in their faces. What in the hells did they do?"

Dameron blinked. "You can tell him five hundred times, but it's not gonna work, not any of them. We've only been trying for the past decade, and he's gotten worse, not better."

The floor beneath him shook. "If you think I'd give a fraction of consideration to a _Stormtrooper traitor-_ " But he couldn't kill Finn, not if he wanted to keep Dameron and Rey without the use of force. To escape from drowning in his own rage, he grabbed frantically at the Link, grappling for Hux's infallible calm, even in his greatest moments of fury.

It came. Not quite Dark, not quite Light, a sort of neutral indifference borne of extreme stress, extended periods of intensive training only the highest of the First Order received. A blend between both, what his grandfather heralded, what he was supposed to be aiming towards. It felt like a gentle breeze in painful heat; not so overwhelming as to tip the balance to the opposing side, but enough of a break to let him breathe. To exist without the crushing weight of each Side, warring with each other to no end.

"You wouldn't know," Kylo said. "You don't have a family." Finn flinched back, hurt seeping into the Force. He shook his head. "No, it's better. You won't be under constant scrutiny, relentless comparison. You're free to do whatever you want. I can only try to be."

Finn looked disgusted at this, a flicker of something pitying flashing over his face, like Kylo was some miserable wretch of a thing, inhuman and incapable of processing basic emotion. " _That's_ what you think of your family? That's what you think family's about? Do you- did Snoke tell you that?"

"Snoke wanted me to see them as a burden, yes, but the pressure I've been under, that's been a constant in my life. Snoke didn't create the idea that I wasn't allowed to follow my own path, he just encouraged it. Now, _now_ I see he simply wanted me to follow _his_ path. I love them, but they won't look at me."

Finn looked unconvinced. "Have you ever actually, y'know, gone up and talked to them about it? Because I get it, it's hard when you don't live up to expectations, story of my life right there, but... how do you know they care all that much about it in the end? The Sith thing, you can guess why that'd throw them off, but just being different, your own self and not a clone of them? That's something anyone could see they'd... treasure." He shrugged. "Best word I could think of."

"It's not that I'm different. Perhaps it's that I've made too many mistakes, that I've got too much of Vader in me. They look at me and see him. Not Anakin, but Vader at the end. A killing... hollow shell."

"So you're too scared to face them?" Dameron snapped. "When Han comes, and he's coming, you're going to talk to him. If you're serious about the whole First Order reform thing - which I doubt, but hey, miracles happen - then you're going to need to be on speaking terms with the heads of the Resistance. And that's discounting the fact that they're your family and they're karking burnt up over you." His face went a little pinched at this, a spark of a bitter memory, tasting like lemonpeel through the Force. "You weren't around to see what you did to them, what you've _been doing_ ever since. Prove you're not His second hollow shell. Talk to them."

"I will. It's inevitable."

"See?" Hux cut in. "He plans to. Now, to prioritise more effectively, how about we first convince Kylo's father we're not here to kill him and make off with his dead body on his own stolen ship?"

* * *

"He knows I'm here," Kylo said. "So I must be the one to greet him."

Hux gave him a puzzled stare and sighed, as if he'd come to expect nothing else. Kylo didn't aim to be confusing, he told people what he wanted and how he wanted it done, but he knew his actions were mysteries to everyone else. "How does that follow?"

"I am not a coward," Kylo said, very slowly. "If I back away into a corner, it shows that I only run from my problems, that I don't have the courage to face them. I won't allow him to think _that_ was what I'd become in all our years apart."

"Very well," Hux said. "Show you mean no harm, and don't get our guests killed. Interpersonal issues should never, under any possible circumstance, reflect back onto First Order business."

"I can see why you'd think I would. But this is... different. Unexpected. I'm not angry, only surprised, sad, frustrated. I won't jeopardise the mission objective, Hux."

Hux twisted his mouth a little, into something not quite a frown, not quite a smile. Introspective, displeased. He'd work endlessly to put a rough situation back under his control. "Good, then. Go along. We'll remain here until we're assured the situation is under control. I'd prefer not to die at a very angry, emotionally distressed Han Solo's hands."

Kylo nodded, and walked steadily in the direction of the boarding ramp.

* * *

The first thing he thought when he saw his father was that he looked old and tired, in a way he never had before. When Kylo was a child, Han had been frequently exhausted, working as a smuggler, as a General in the Rebel Alliance, and as a new and hopelessly confused parent, but he'd worked through it. Leia and Luke had always known just what to say and to do, while the tiny Ben Solo had floundered uselessly. So much so that he'd throw himself into his father's arms and apologise when his mother and uncle weren't around. He'd felt powerless, never moreso than at Luke's temple, seeing all the things the Force could do, and feeling so out of reach, so unable to help anyone, not even his own father.

And then Snoke had told him everything he'd wanted to hear. And Ben had believed it, all of it, down to the very last word. He'd devoted himself so truly, so desperately, that he'd even agreed to kill the one person he'd only ever tried to help. And in a way, he already had.

In front of him, Kylo realised, was all the evidence that everything he'd ever thought as a child was as far from the truth as possible. Not ever, through all the pain and work they'd all endured, not _ever_ had Kylo ever seen his father look so defeated.

And he was the one responsible.

And remarkably, though he wanted to scream through breath he could barely draw, he stood eerily still and said, "Hello, Han."

There was no doubt that Han had sensed him on board, and yet he still looked as if he'd taken a slap to the face, staring owlishly, eyes unreadable. The look made him feel vaguely ill, off-kilter, _tainted,_ and so he stepped aside and let Han pass. His face was something hollow, but he managed some pathetic excuse for a smile. "What're you doing on my ship, kiddo?"

"We found it rusting to scrap on Jakku."

"And sent it off for special delivery?"

"It was... our getaway vehicle."

Han snorted at this. "You're still getting yourself into trouble. I'm not surprised."

"I may have snapped at a few people unaccustomed to being questioned in any way." He frowned, and insisted, defensively, "They deserved it. They were responsible for stealing our _original_ ship."

"D'you really expect any less on Jakku?"

Kylo shook his head. No, he didn't. He'd come to expect only the worst, but he was ashamed for allowing his mind to wander far enough that he'd forget something so important as the ship's security. Worse even than that, he'd not recognised the ship he ended up escaping on, the ship he'd spent so much of his own youth hidden within. Without Snoke's guidance, he was thrown off-balance, but he was too prideful, too embarrassed to ask Grandfather for help centring himself.

"Ship probably wasn't worth half a credit, anyway," Han said, sneering. "I'm sure a Hutt drunk on spice ale could engineer a better piece of junk."

"First Order engineering is-" Kylo stopped. "Lacking, on occasion. Our schedule is consistently filled."

"Too busy to make anything better than a tin can fly?" Han shrugged. "Damn, I didn't know you were so booked up."

"Father," Kylo said. "I've- that is to say- Hux and I have broken off from Snoke's leadership. The First Order will be ours alone now."

Han stopped. "Let me get this straight. You and that- _ginger fanatic_ are staging a coup?" Slowly, steadily, he began to laugh, until tears stung the corners of his eyes and threatened to roll down his cheeks. "I can't buy it. You're both too loyal."

"All that has changed now. Someone I... deeply respect has shown me the true path of the Force, and the error of my judgement and loyalty to Snoke."

Father was still hesitant. "Who told you? I'll need someone to corroborate this, of course. And not your new partner in crime. He'd easily be in on it."

"Very well." Kylo paused. "Though you could simply sense if I were truly lying."

Han chewed the side of his lip. "I'm flattered you believe in my instincts this much, Kylo, but even they're not foolproof."

"They're not simply instincts," he pushed. "The Force guides you."

"That's not how it works. I don't just get the Force because everyone I know has it."

He'd had this argument a thousand times, but not in years. Not in so many years. Suddenly, he couldn't stop. "No, you have it naturally."

"Say you're not lying," Han said, slow. "What now? You ally with the Resistance?"

"We were hoping so, yes. I need to see Uncle Luke, it's imperative that he teach me what he knows, so I can follow my true path and defeat Snoke."

Han winced, then, aching in the Force like reopened wounds, a grinding, dizzying sort of pain. Like someone was carving him from the inside out. "If you're going to the Resistance in the hopes on getting information on Luke, you're out of luck, kiddo. Nobody's seen him for years."

"But the map. You have the map."

"Not all of it."

Kylo choked, feeling a slow rising panic. "No, no, we have the droid, Dameron's droid. We have the map. You can tell us how to access it!"

Han looked at him with such pity, such sadness, that Kylo truly was tempted to rake scars into the _Falcon's_ hull. "You have a piece of the map," he began, softly. "Artoo has the other piece. And he hasn't been functional for a long, long time."

Kylo was reeling, hands buried in his hair, backing into the nearest corridor, as if the ship herself could tell him the answers he needed. Hux stood there, unashamedly eavesdropping, looking stricken. "I _must_ find him. I must find Master Luke!"

"It's a start, isn't it?" Hux asked. "Something to work with, as opposed to our previous sum total of nothing at all."

Han eyed him. "The fanatic. So the brat _is_ here." A sigh. "It's not much to work with. The two pieces, they're lock and key. Artoo has the key. Has the pinpoint location. The lock just gives you a vague idea. And Luke hides with stupid, stupid talent; a vague idea isn't enough. Believe me, I've tried. We've all tried."

Hux pinched the bridge of his nose, white-knuckle grip tearing crescent moons into his flesh. "It was indeed a test, then, Kylo. We'll have to ask directly from the source. And who knows what prerequisites he'll have in mind before he agrees to hand over the intel?"

Han's eyes narrowed, honed in on them. His suspicion pooled like overflowing liquid, seeping around them in the Force. "Directly from what source?"

"That, I believe," Hux said, solemn, "is going to take some explaining. I'll need a drink. And a lot of time."

"Pal," Han started, and abruptly, Kylo could see he was nervous, apprehensive, about something other than them, "I usually have those in spades. But right now I think we've got ourselves a more pressing problem."

Hux raised a brow. "And what problem might that be?"

"Rathtars," he offered, with a guilty smile.

" _Rathtars?_ " Hux bellowed. " _Rathtars!_ "

Kylo said nothing, only focused every fibre of his being on not ripping the _Falcon_ apart at her seams. The ship shook, and within seconds, their three Resistance refugees were panting with them in the halls. "What's this about _rathtars?_ " Dameron asked, icy.

"Scratch that," said Finn. "What the hell is wrong with you, man?"

Rey turned to Han, incredulous. "You brought those beasts on board?" She paused. "They are beasts, aren't they?"

"I- Yes, yes they are," he started. "I guess I've got a lot of explaining to do myself, huh? Like how I lost the ship in the first place. Or these, uh, unwanted guests."

Rey scowled. "Can we fix it?"

"Hah! Of course! 'Course we can!" Han soothed, in the voice Kylo had always heard from him in his childhood, during their worst moments. The voice that meant he had no idea what in the stars' name he was doing.

* * *

 **Author's Note:** OOPS I ACCIDENTALLY

here, have what took place while writing, and it shall explain all:

1:50 AM - ShakyHades: first sentence  
1:50 AM - ShakyHades: ouch  
1:50 AM - ShakyHades: let me breathe  
1:50 AM - Jason Todd's Hot Bod: IKR im killing even me here  
1:51 AM - ShakyHades: ouch  
1:51 AM - ShakyHades: ouch  
1:51 AM - ShakyHades: that hurts

4:27 AM - Jason Todd's Hot Bod: i'  
4:28 AM - Jason Todd's Hot Bod: i just read a fic  
4:28 AM - Jason Todd's Hot Bod: and i've never cried  
4:28 AM - Jason Todd's Hot Bod: so much before  
4:28 AM - Jason Todd's Hot Bod: it's so  
4:28 AM - Jason Todd's Hot Bod: moving  
4:28 AM - Jason Todd's Hot Bod: it's truly moving and like? wTF DO I DO WITH THIS SEA OF EMOTIONS NOW  
4:33 AM - ShakyHades: u harness it  
4:33 AM - ShakyHades: and write sg  
4:36 AM - ShakyHades: and u kill ur readers  
4:36 AM - Jason Todd's Hot Bod: i will  
4:36 AM - Jason Todd's Hot Bod: i will do so

Sorry for being late. The end of 2016 was pretty shitty, and then I had school to reckon with, and then I came down with flu. Hopefully I can hurry my sorry ass up for the rest of the chapters.


End file.
